Tuesday, September 25, 2012

{18 Month Breakdown} Or Meltdown. Ha.

So, My CamBamWham {or "My Nena" as her brother calls her} is 18 Months!

And, trust me she is everything and then some in our lives.

Spice.
Sweetness and oh so very sassy this little piece of heaven of mine!

Let me tell'ju! Esta Señorita...es toda una Señorita... like uhm 2 going on 18.

She needs her p'urse..with a pouty lip at the end to do everything. She is oh so very emotional and drama...she get it from her Momma! Ha.

She is just walking, talking perfection. She is tough trust me! Took an almost 3 foot tumble off a table this month...and while in the ER she took over her own check up! I am sure the Doctor's thought I was bluffing. None the less she is tough..I am Blessed and God has given me so much more than I deserve. Ever.

Everyday she looks more and more like a Mini-Me. I can't wait to see her grow and really look like me! Just sayin'the boy is all Daddy someone has got to look like me!

She walks the walk and talks the talk..she is learning to pray and wants to do everything that her Big Brother 'Pantiago  does! She is a Daddy's little girl and his heart melts at her little chirps of..."I wanna...."

She has attitude and will not hesitate at rolling those two gorgeously HUGE brown  eyes of hers. Those long legs...yep still growing! She loves HUGS. Even though her brother MUST...he does. She has stinky feet and straight straight hair..oyi. The hair. Ha.

She is a giggle box...a fake one at that. She dances to Moves like Jagger and eats everything in site. She doesn't mind to fart and be silly. It's in her nature. She is smart and happy. I love her to pieces and my life wouldn't be complete without her.

Camila,

You are without a doubt the missing puzzle that completes this family. We love you more than words will ever know. I pray that as you grow I can protect you and keep you safe. I pray that God will give you health and love everyday. You are silly when ever you get a chance, you love to explore and learn new things, you learn them quick and move fast. You follow your brother and Daddy most every where. You are a little monkey and hang off of Momma all day long.... You love that 'pon {Binkie}. You wear a size 4 diaper and your clothes are all size 2T for length... you are skinny and tall and you love to sing and dance. I pray that your joyful spirit never goes away and that it only grows to shine the light that God has given you. You have a soft heart and are easily hurt...I pray that you can be stronger stronger as you grow. I love you and we are so Blessed that you are in our lives. Your Daddy, 'Pantiago and I wish you so much more than you will ever know... and even though you and your brother fight..he loves you so much..you are his Nena and our little Angel!

Happy 18 months. We love you.

~Momma


Tuesday, September 18, 2012

{weary...and decisions}

Normal and OK. Is that really too much to ask for?

Like really.

All I want is for one day to be normal. For one day to be ok. No drama, no ailments.

Is that too much to ask for?

Anyway. I don't usually share too much but here we go...

My Hubby was gone for 3 weeks to Utah, for work... he may have to leave again here in the near future...I think the responsibilities of being a Momma of Dos, a Wife, an outside the home working Momma and just everything else that makes life happen on a day to day basis has finally caught up with me.

I am sick. Nothing to worry about I hope. I have seen my regular doctor he has give me his opinion. He says to me. "Mrs. Gomez, I think you do too much!"..I say to him... "I think YOU do too much!"... what? Like a boss. Ha. No but seriously he has given me a serious decision to make and a referral to a Internal Specialist. I will see her on Thursday and I think that based on that I will know what and where this life will lead.

But, back to my question. Normal and OK, is it possible??

If it isn't then what in the world will I ever do?

I pray.

I think.

And, soon I must decide.

We shall see.

Oh, the Dramas of an everyday Momma..... {this line is so totally my tag line from now on...} Ha.


Sunday, September 16, 2012

3 Years Ago Today.... ♥

3 years ago today.....

I gave birth after 24 hours of labor and an emergency c-section...to a little man. One with an angel face. Whom I fell in love with from the minute I knew he grew inside of me. A little man that captured my heart and kept me up late every night for a year, not by choice. 
Today he is smart, strong, confident and so brave! He is energy that his 31 year old Momma is not. He is love that I never knew I could feel. He is faith that I knew one day would come. He is one of the Loves of my life. I fell in love with him and now I know... that a Momma's love is like no other. 

But, I pray....that he grows up to be independent and self-sufficient, that he is confident yet humble. That he can recognize when he is wrong and correct his errors. I pray that as the years go by he realizes the sacrifice that we have made for him to be where he will want to be. I pray that his faith grows like the mustard seed. I pray that he looks up to his Dad for being a man of perseverance and love. That he has a caring heart and that he never gives up on his dreams! I pray that he knows that he can accomplish anything he wants in this life if he works hard and that he shouldn't expect for anything to be handed to him.....by anyone. That while we are always here for support, life is about making your own mistakes, learning from them and moving forward. I pray that God will keep him safe and protect him from all harm and evil but that he knows that this life is unfortunately unfair. But, I pray that he can grow up to be strong and gentle with those who love him. That he is a man of great faith and character and that he knows when he is being too nice and when he should lend a helping hand. 

Santiago, 

You are only 3 but I wish so much for you and your future...only when you are OLD, like me...in your 30-something years and decide to have children...you will know the prayers and request that fill my heart... the love and faith that you were the second I knew you were being formed deep inside my womb. I pray that you love us and are thankful for all the things that God has provided for us in this life and that you never take anything for granted because someone somewhere in your family worked really hard to cross a border that separates two worlds... in order for us to give you a better future....and just so you know you were born into a family of clowns...we are not normal and you will be embarrassed by us, one day..{HA.}hopefully never embarrassed of us and trust me you will be just fine and hopefully grow into a normal adulthood, enough to know that you are loved and that we want you to be proud of our accomplishments and our family!

With that said...You {and your Sister} are the light of our world... you are the love in our hearts and TRUE BLESSINGS & GIFTS from up above. God has been so good to us and we do NOT have regrets. You shouldn't either... 

Happy Birthday my Big Boy. Everyday that passes by I look at you {& your Sister}in amazement. I can't believe that God would Bless me so big even though I don't deserve you.... we love you more than life and because of you, life is love! 

Con mucho Amor Siempre, 

Yo'Momma





Saturday, September 8, 2012

{Mid-Life Crisis} or Not...

I know who I am...

Cheesy beyond repair
Faithful without doubt
A little over confident
Dramatic; Fo'sho'
Talkie and Loved
Impatient
A Momma of Dos and Wife to One
Blessed
Loud and outspoken
Truthful and Bold
An Overthinker {this is getting better with age...}
A true friend
Gosspiy {workin' on it..LOTS!}
Loved
Forgiven
A hopeless romantic
An optimist with a dark side
Emo' at times
 Happy
A fatty girl who loves food {did I say LOVES food...cause I do}
a Dreamer of BIG HUGE dreams!
Someone with a Past {at times very sad}
A survivor at best
a Sharer
A storyteller
a  writer
a creator of crafts
A dancer at heart
giver
caregiver
provider
supporter
A Daughter
A Sister
a mover and shaker....
I make it happen...
no matter how hard it is to stand...I do
I am a defender of those people, places and situations that I think need me
I face reality and stand up for what I believe in.
I voice it all and leave nothing at rest
I am a pusher
I am a critic
I know I can be a nag
 A Believer
Jesus Follwer
Bible Reader

Trust me. 
I know who I am.


I am not sure what all my brain, heart and soul have been going through lately  but I do know that God has been hard at work...for months now... the clouds are clearing though and everything that was murky and dark are now looking bright and clear!
At least I think so....

How can it be that at 31 I still feel...lost? Am I am not where I want to be? Does life have more for me? Maybe I should stop while I am ahead....

But, seriously. If I feel this way at 31, I definitely don't want to feel lost at 41.
I would want to have my life in place by the time I am 40 and my kids are older...
I don't mean perfect.
I just mean, well adjusted and settled....stable and established.
Happy and fulfilled.

I know.
Trust me, I know how Blessed I am.
I have TWO amazing children.
I have an awesome Husband. I have a great family and a good job.
What else do you want Connie?
You can't have the world...I know this.
I don't want to loose myself because I am constantly seeking better....
I simply want life to be LIFE but better... Ha.

No pues no quieres nada!

Yo se que....el que quiere azul celeste que le cueste...
but how much is it ?
Cause I am more than sure that I have paid it in full and then some!
Ha.

Or maybe not but it sure does feel like it....