Downsizing (Part II)

I didn't think I had so much input about this subject but I think it's important to know our story, our situation and our reasoning. I may be helping someone gain perspective or simply realize, you are not alone!

Needless to say, Ricardo and I had very different mindsets and were in a "bad" situation.

Well we made it through 2008, again Ricardo is very money savvy. He had savings, 401k, and got unemployment for 8 months. He then landed a job with Baker Hughes. He was unhappy there and after a year and a week before my son was born he found himself hitting that unemployment line one more time. This time, with more insight as to how it would all work out. We now had to factor in our son, the extra person to care for. So, we downsized even more! NO worries here. I was already used to it. What does that mean? We don't just spend. And even though it may seem sad to most; we have not done Birthday, Anniversary or Christmas presents for myself or Ricardo in the last 2 years. You simply, do without. At this point. I don't miss it. We have a Blessed extended family and amazing friends who give us their endless love and support, which is what God wants us to focus on right now.

So, today it's December 2010, we have had a rough and very, very meager last 3 years. Still we manage and even as penny pincher's we managed to afford to do enough and have just enough. I really don't mind that I have been wearing the same pair of shoes for over a year or that I haven't bought a new outfit in over a year, that I clip my own nails and avoid the hair salon... It's NOT that bad...I can do without! Trust me. I know how at this point. We know how and we pull through!

In watching this TV show; Downsized, I made the following observations:

• That at times the Mom was more spoiled than her children! She was the one unable to control her urge to spend on that super expensive cup of coffee....You know which one... I mean it's great coffee but seriously, some self control is all is takes.  
• That SERIOUSLY all it takes is a change in attitude! Yours and your spouses; you have to be on the same page...at all times and at all cost.
• That we have to remember that our children resemble us. They mimic who we are and what we do, all the time. Surprisingly in this family though the Mom was very spoiled and of their 7 children, only 1 had the Mom's attitude; he was expectant; expecting more and more and more. Most the other kids made the needed sacrifices, understood what it meant to make them and dealt with it in a healthy manner. 
• The part that upset me most was in an instance when the Mom had to tell their 10 year old daughter that she couldn't participate in all of her usual summer activities; such as Cheer leading and Theater Camp; she had so little self control that she cried in front of the child. It kind of gave the idea that it was ok to be overly upset about loosing materialistic things. I didn't agree with that. She should have held her composure and could have cried about it later. The Mom stated that she was sad that her kids didn't have the life that she had grown up with. She had money as a child. Well as an adult we must be the example of sacrifice. I think.
• The Mom then turns her frown upside down and creates a job for them all to help with; House Cleaning! And, although she states that it was "demeaning"..I would have chosen the word humbling but in the end; she was taught a very valuable lesson and her daughters were there to help her get through it. They all learned the value of earning a good dollar, even the Mom. I loved this part.

In the end the lessons I learned were above all; Communication, Love, Patience, Budgeting and in the end some alone time to relax and knock all the stress out is never a bad idea!


BTW: I like the show but am just taking the good from the bad and applying it to how I am learning things in my own life! If you watch you will learn that the family is a combined family; Mom had 5 children from a previous marriage and Dad had 2. The Mom has MS. The Dad is an unemployed Contract Construction worker. Their story is one to learn from.  

I Can Do WithOUT...CAN YOU? (Part I)

Seems like these days everyone is talking about FINANCES. What to do, what to do? With so little money and so much to pay, buy and get! Well appropriately enough, while I was in the Hospital I saw a show on WEtv called: Downsized.

I am sure a million people have already gone, "THAT'S AN OLD SHOW!" Yes. Well you see, we don't have cable in our home. In many ways my husband and I have taken on this "Downsized" mentality even before an "expert" has to remind us, that it's always good to "Downsize"!

My husband worked for 7 years at the same job. He NEVER thought he would leave that job, at least not until he graduated from college which because of ..ohh I don't know...LIFE...he has taken a little longer than most students to complete.

Well, in 2007 after 7 years the company was sold and guess what, hundreds were laid-off. Laid-off? My husband's mind and world were blown away, he had not been without a job since his teenage years. He was now; 28, still in college, with a mortgage and thoughts of starting a family! Well everything was placed on hold and he set out to finish school and find a new job. At that time, we cut back on a lot. No more parties at our house, no more expensive dinners, no more yearly vacations, no more of  a lot...how selfish and dumb of us to wait for a situation like this to happen to change our mind set! We were humbled to say the least. "Everyone" around us was "moving on up", doing and being. Or so we thought. Here we were, stuck and down about money. ABOUT MONEY? Wow. Needless to say it changed our entire perspective about everything.

I didn't grow up rich and neither did my husband. I have stated in the past that I took my first job at 14 years of age. I cleaned houses and office buildings during my summer break with my Mom and Aunt. All the while my Mom would tell me, "Ya ves, por que te digo que acaves la escuela y que pongas atencion...para que no acaves como yo!" ("Do you see why I tell you to do good in school and to not loose focus...so you will not do what I do for a living!") And yes, I did finish school. I have a college degree but these days, even that isn't enough.

My husband grew up pretty much the same as I did. With very little but just enough! Even so, we both had two VERY different mentalities; mine was "If you have it spend it!", his...not so much. He is a very wise money decision maker. He always has a savings account ...WITH MONEY IN IT [Ha.] and looks for a good bargain... me..not so much... and then we got married. I quickly adopted his money views, he is usually right about money! Another thing that we differed in was about our children. Before we got married, I always said.."I am going to GIVE my children ALL that I never had! And, that's that!" Wow. How selfish on my behalf! To negate my children of learning about selfless-ness, about hard work and good ethic, about earning your way!

I now know that the best way for my children to become wise money decision makers is NOT by giving them EVERYTHING I never had; but by treating them as if I can't give them everything and reminding them that hard work is the REAL way to earn your way in this life. It will hopefully and God willing make them more money conscious and selfless as well as make them humble and Godly human beings.

I didn't always get what I wanted when I was young, and we didn't always have what all the other kids had! But, we never went without food, shelter and love.

When I started working and making money I thought, let me use it up and go crazy, huge mistake! I was quickly in debt and broke!

I didn't get the correct money education, thankfully God knew that and He placed the right man in my life...who would quickly knock me off my high horse and remind me to clean that floor until my finger nails bled to earn my way through life!

It sounds harsh but I appreciate it very much!