Hola Septiembre! #mommaofdos

People say I am a dreamer... oh yeah and a little crazy and ambitious too.

I am.

 

And, like August, September has so much meaning. In 2004 it was a difficult eye opening month for our family. It was never ending and hopeless we almost lost my father to addiction a situation my family doesn't take lightly. Our story was written, our lives were changed....then 5 years later a complete 360. Hope, faith, life, rebirth. My son was born {Sept. 16th}, he was the light, the tie, the sign of good that we all needed. And, my father, like everyone else...fighting to live life once again, taking charge of his life and regaining his family.

Not only is September my Son's birth month, it's also the month that was honored with my Momma's birth {Sept.26th}. That same woman that experienced life in the most painful way and today is the only reason why I never, ever, EVER give-up. Her and my son are part of my motivation. My inspiration. My reason. My faith. My life.

It's also Hispanic Heritage month, AJUAH!!!!  {September 15th-October 15}

And, {September 16th} Mexico's Independence Day!!! AJUAH!!!!

Every month since May I have told myself, I am going to take a break but I only take on more projects and more collaborations. And, I am tired but you know what I wouldn't have it any other way! I don't know where this road is leading me to but I am running it and I can't give up now.... or ever...

My Momma always says.... "Si vas a hacer algo, hazlo bien!" Which is probably why I never give-up on my dream for this little here blog, which is why I believe in being consistent and finding time for my priorities!

{4 years Santiago} Letters to my Son

My Beautiful Baby,
{it's what I call you every time I hold you in my arms, by the way...you are really big but still I hold you like a baby...my baby....}



Today you are 4 years old.
You are active and no one can stop you.
You are stubborn but still a sweet baby.
You are beautiful and loving.
Your smile lights up a room.
If you sleep long enough you wake up and say
"Good Morning Mami!"

You are taller than most and in a size 6/7 clothes and size 11 shoe.
You brighten up my days and make me nervous all at once.
Everyday is a new adventure for you and you are eager to take on the day's "challenges"...

You are curious and sometimes we don't agree.... you want your way and I
want what's best.

Your life is so simple and easy. You don't know how to have
a bad day. And, everyday that I pick you up from school you say,
"Mom, I had fun today!"
You have fun everyday, even when you don't feel good or are in a bad mood.
You fight with your Sister, a lot but you are also very protective, loving and giving...
when  you want to be.
You are definitely a Momma's boy and your Dad's best buddy.
You love to make up words and speak Spanish when needed.
You are full of life and vibrant!
You love to run and play and laugh and just be happy....you tell me...
"Mom, just let me be happy!"
when I try to calm you down or keep you quiet.

You are very much a ladies man and you even have the best dance moves.
You love all things "boy", you are rough and tough but sweet and sensitive and you even play with your Sister's babies and kitchen.

You want reassurance as to how much I love you almost daily. I don't mind telling you how amazing and beautiful you are and how much I love you...but know that this life is not fair and people of the world will never make you who you are. God has created you; strong, unique and loved...that is all that matters.
Your best friend in daycare is "Sanchez", the other Santiago of the class.

You are my life and although it's often filled with tantrums and tears...you have a way of turning all my wrongs into the best rights ever. God has blessed us with you and your Sister.
You are the little man that stole my heat 4 years ago.
Your Daddy and I love you { & Camila} more than life!

You may not know this but you have everything you need and everyone you need in your life, maybe not everything you want but we provide what we know you need to thrive as a child and to grow; mentally, physically and emotionally. We support you and we will always be here for you..if one day we are not..don't be scared...look to God, He has brought us this far.... and He will take us the distance...

Santiago; you have no idea the amazing and intelligent little boy that you are, you say the best things and you come up with the best comments... every word that you say is heard and acknowledged.

And, yes...some days we have our days. You push every button and try to surpass every limit. We keep you in line. And, although it's cliche...at times..it hurts us more than it hurts you...we want you to be happy but we also want you to learn to be respectful and humble. We will never break your spirit although sometimes you act as if it's the end of the world when the word "NO" comes out of our mouths. You have survived and you will survive even the most stern "NO's", life is filled with them so it's better you hear them now from us and learn that they are normal.

You are a great son and a good boy but you are over active and sometimes you beat us at the how's and what to do with you.... your imagination is expressed in so many ways. You love to draw Angry Birds,  your favorite game, in every notebook. You also draw me and your Dad and Camila. We look like potatoes but one day it will be different, practice makes perfect. You play with all your toys as if they were alive, scary yes but so amazing to watch.

You are built like an athlete and even "Box" with your Dad, and talk about "faceball"...{baseball, basketball or football...they are all "faceball"} yet I have a feeling the arts maybe your calling...your Dad claims I think everything is your calling at the end of the day..it's up to you. God will guide you. You will know how to use your talents and what you will develop.

You love watching "Connie Cow" on Youtube. You know how to use my cellphone and computer better than me at times. You love your GranMa and GranPa. You pray for us all and have special request when you know our loved ones are ill. You tell me about your Bible readings and sing songs everyday. And, so much more!

I love you and pray to God that you remain healthy and protected by all of those who love you. No words can ever describe how we feel on a daily basis to have you and your Sister in our lives!

Happy 4th Birthday my beautiful baby Boy!!!

We Love you!!!!

Momma {Daddy & Camila too!}

Beliefs and Curanderas..... #maldeojo

{Disclaimer: Yes, I am Catholic. While I am Catholic I don't have a limited or closed minded view about religion, faith and seeking God in your own manner and beliefs. I would NEVER attempt to make others think, believe or pray the way I do. So, please be kind with your thoughts and words. I believe in Jesus, the Father and the Holy Spirit as well as the, the Virgin Mary & the Virgen de Guadalupe and all the Saints.}

I am not usually a "disclaimer" type of person. I am who I am, my faith is my own and I really don't believe in making others convert or thinking like me ever. We are all entitled to our own feelings, thoughts and beliefs.





With that said.

The other day I caught myself trying to "sweep" my son with an egg, you know how the Curanderas do or in my case my Momma does. My Son was not in the mood for anything and he had maybe the worse freak out moment while I was attempting to bathe him. I asked him if he was OK, I checked him to see if he was hurt and moments after the episode and without knowing what to think I started to pray with fervor over my son.

I usually pray with or over my children before bed or in the morning but this day, it was a different kind of prayer and I had no idea how or what but I felt like I needed to take action. Trust me it wasn't anything medical because I know my son and he was fine. Had I felt that he had to go to the Hospital I would have taken him. I am a fairly new Momma but I know my children well and I tend to trust my instincts pretty well.

I then thought of finding him an amuleto, in particular the ojo de venado bracelet to protect him from el mal de ojo and  evil spirits. Was I going over board or just being a Momma and thinking of everything I can do for my child? I don't know but he has not had an episode since and I have been lighting my candles and praying over my home every night. It brings me peace. As prayer usually does.

My Momma usually likes to bathe them and then pray over them with the egg...it gives her peace of mind... I don't mind it and as long as what we do is pray...I never see anything wrong with it. Am I weird? Maybe. Am I Mexican? For sure.

How about you? Your Momma or Abuelita ever try to do any special ritual for you or your kids?   

Terrible TWO's? Sure. Why not?

It doesn't matter how many times you drive me insane. Or how fast I have to run to catch up with you. Or how many fits you throw. Or even how many times I wish I could fall into a hole while you yell. 

None of that matters. 

I will always {always} cherish this time. These moments. 

Of dancing with you, while I carry you in my arms. Of hearing your amazing laugh in my ear. Of seeing your beautiful smile filled with little white teeth. Those mischievous eyes that say "ready or not..here I come!" The smell of those amazingly stinky little toes. The life within you. The joy in your heart. Your unconditional love. Hearing the word "Ma-Ma" over and over {and over} again...while you stretch your arms out for me to hold you. The moments when we sit and watch a movie and you fall asleep in the warmth of my arms. Those amazing hugs and kisses that only you can give.

It is in these moments {and many others} that I feel more than Blessed to be your Momma. 

Know that no matter how many times I lose it or how many times I get after you...Nothing...No-one can take away the Love, the Joy, and the Happiness in my heart....today or ever. 

I love you Son more than words will ever express. Te Amo.

In 2 months you will be TWO.  

They say that's when the real fun begins....and you know what..I CAN'T WAIT! 

My Heart. My All. You make me smile even when I don't have the strength to.