One Word ::Instagram::

The week before New Year's is a busy one. People are seeking resolutions to be made and goals to keep up with. I am no different. I seek inspiration, new motivation to propel me through another year. 

If you know me, you know that Instagram is one of my favorite places. I follow several like-minded Bloggers and now Fitness Momma's. I find all kind of new information. I use a lot of hash-tags and I love it. 

Well a few days before January 1, I found an Instagram Momma who posted about "One Word". It's a devotional on the YouVersion App or website. I looked into it and I read that when I found my "one word", I would know. I didn't believe it. But, it has happened. You allow this word to transform you over the next 365 {now 364} days. 

The weekend before January 1 I went out to eat with my family. While there the chaos unfolded, as usual, my unruly toddlers took over our dinner and I couldn't find order no matter how upset I became. Instead I ate my dinner choking back tears and with feelings of having failed that night, like many other nights. I am pretty resilient and I shook it off. 

Then over the next few days, like almost every American, maybe person around the word, I began to reflect on 2013 and the days to come in 2014. I read one night on Instagram, "some years are questions. others are answers." Last year no doubt was difficult, a lot happened. No job, illnesses, death, and moments of uncertainty. I allowed many people and situations to take me to a place of bitterness and to steal my joy. Not because I was jealous or not happy for other people's success but because I felt as if people around us were not happy for our small or big successes and maybe even wished we would fail. 

As much as we want our Social Media appearance to be equal to our real lives, it hardly ever seems that way. I attempt to be real and post most of our failures for others to relate to and learn from. But, at the same time I don't want to be a Debbie Downer who only has complaining and un-happy moments to share, who does? Which is probably why my Husband has this idea that other's think we are perfect. No matter how many times I repeat it, doesn't seem to sink in. We are NOT perfect, far from it. But, we try everyday to wake up and get this life right. 

Now the reflection: What do I want to do differently in 2014? There have been many moments when I can't relax. I can't get comfortable in my own situation. Not because of myself or my kids, or my Husband but because of those around me. What will they think? What will they say? How harsh will they judge me as a Momma, as a Wife, as an employee, as a person, as a writer.... etc. Then one night as I read through a devotional it happened. My word. "My word" for 2014 had come to me and I knew it was MY word. 

To seek it in every moment of chaos. To be reminded that no matter what or how bad the situation is we should always remain. It was there. I felt it and I loved it. I hope that for the next 364 days I can embrace it and allow it to transform me. So that 364 days from now I can say I had the best year because of this word.... 

PEACE. 

Peace in who I am. 

Peace in where I am going. 

Peace in where I have come from. 

Peace in how far I have already traveled. 

Peace in the moments of chaos. 

Peace no matter who is watching. 

Peace. {And hope that this word will lead to better things.}

What about you? What has been your reflection and answer for 2014??

Early {New} Year Re-solutions

So, you thought 2013 would be a year full of purpose and direction and it's now October and you can't seem to see your vision. But, why? No worries, re-direct and get it together!

I had many goals for this year. Sure most of them were accomplished and maybe slightly re-directed but honestly sometimes life is life and it just doesn't happen how you envisioned. Well, now is the time to start re-thinking those goals for the rest of this year. And yes, why not for 2014? Trust me, it will be here before we know it. It’s never too early to start thinking about what we want for ourselves.

 

A few ways that I plan on getting back on track are:

Re-Organizing~ I started my year as a Stay@HomeMomma and then converted back to being a WorkingOutsidetheHomeMomma so my every day has been flipped up-side down! It's been almost 5 months and I think I am finally finding a new balance. Schedules are falling into place. Energy and motivation are finally back. My best advice; don't take on too much and when you feel overwhelmed take a break! 

Re-Thinking~ I am going to go over my goals and re-think, re-evaluate and re-prioritize what I feel needs to get done to accomplish some of my personal, home and blogging goals! I think everything in life can be re-written no need to get flustered or upset...just re-think it! 

Take Action~ After I am done re-organizing myself and re-thinking what and how things will be done the rest of the year and in 2014; then I will definitely be set to TAKE ACTION! I want to not only be a person of words but also of actions! 

What about you? Have you thought about way to start over and start planning for next year?!

Developing Self-Worth {Career}

The other day I wrote about my faith and how much I have grown and learned over the years. Today, I want to tackle the Career aspect of Developing Self-Worth.

I have had a pretty good range of experiences in my life. From cleaning houses in the Summer when I was in High School with my Momma and my Tia to working in a Downtown office for corporate America. I had never really been without work. Or never really had to "find" a job. Most my positions were obtained because I knew someone. 

The last 6 months have definitely been an experience, not just the Staying@ Home part but the job seeking and seeking my "dream" job. When I was younger my ambitions were limitless. I wanted it all. The perfect job with the best salary and the best boss, with all the amenities and yes, my own corner office in a high rise building. Truth is, who doesn't! Then I started looking for this job and though I am sure that it is out there...I realized what I am really after is environment, flexibility and appreciation. For a company to capture my heart. To feel an excitement that I have not felt in years. 

Truth is. My dream job is one that I can learn and grow in. No matter how long it takes me. If the "amenities" come with it, then so be it. I just realized that companies these days can really make you doubt your self-worth and over all {monetary} worth. I know it shouldn't be all about the money but as a growing family we definitely have to calculate all of the necessities. And, ultimately as individuals we know how much we are worth. We also know the amount of work that it has taken us to be where we are. 

I think that overall if a job is good to you and takes your family into consideration and values your time spent with them then that to me can ultimately become your "dream" job, in the making. It doesn't have to be in a "perfect" place, with "perfect" people and "perfect" circumstances...it can be just about anywhere and I doubt it has to be fancy or of "high prestige". We are who we are because of what we make out of our own unique situation.

When I received my college diploma I thought I was on top of the world, the truth is that in order to make it anywhere you have to work hard and long to get out of it what you put into it. As cliche as that may sound, it's true. 

No matter what we do in life, it's going to take work and true dedication. I know now that what I have been  seeking most my adult life hasn't been a "dream" job but instead, "the" job... and everything else will only be shown through time and continuous dedication. 

In the mean time..I continue to seek and wait. And, wait and seek. It will come. One day....

{2012} In Review

It's crazy to think that just yesterday, or so it seems like it, 2012 was just starting so fresh, so new......

Then I looked at my first post from 2012; and WOW! What a difference a year makes:

::{Click here} FIRST POST OF 2012::

This year was GREAT.

{Click on EACH month to read related posts or see pictures!}
In March; Cami turned ONE! We had a fiesta and a wave of Momma-melt downs began. Many may not know this but this year I battled fiercely with Momma Blues {some type of PPD}. It wasn't fun, therapy helped and after a major melt-down and full-blown panic attack in September, I quit my Full-time job to be a Stay-@-Home-Momma. {Read about it ::here:: ::here:: and ::here::}

In May; My Hubby graduated from college with his Bachelor's degree!!!! GO HUBBY  & GO COOGS!!! Whoop-Whoop!!!

In June; I turned 31. Officially a year in my 30's in 6 months, I will be 32! Wow, just yesterday, I was 18. Wow.

In July; The Hubby landed a pretty sweet job opportunity and it's helped us realize a lot about ourselves and our accomplishments. My Hubby is incredibly smart and an amazingly hard working person. I love him. Lots.

In August; My Hubby  turned 33! Wow! We met when he was 17. Crazy huh?

In September; My Santi turned 3!!! 3!!!! He won't be a baby much longer...makes me sad. A lot. A lot! I also quit my job this month after a not so good event; to become a Stay-@-Home-Momma. Which may be ending soon... because well... it just happens...

In October; a new journey began and I attended my FIRST ever official BLOGGER Conference!!!! Thanks to the Latism Houston Chapter and their sponsorship!!!! Say whaaaa'?? It was great, great month!!! ::PICTURES HERE::

Now it's December 31st, the last day of the year... it's bittersweet....leaving behind all the good and the BAD that happened in 2012 but always remembering that NO MATTER what God was there with us EVERY.SINGLE.STEP.OF.THE.WAY.

As a constant reminder of my faith in 2012, I had some very, very harsh moments but I remained faith-ful and in prayer and God knew when I should have a melt-down and when I needed to be fierce! In everything I did in 2012; failures, successes, happiness, sadness, tears and joy...I honestly looked for God and trusted in Him to give me ever lasting strength... everyday. Every time. As I sit here on the last day of 2012; I want to thank not only my friends and family who remained constant and by my side with their never ending love and support but also Thank You to all the NEW and amazing friends that I added to my Blog, Facebook, and contact book! I love you all and I pray that you and your families have an amazingly wonderful new year!!!!!

Many Blessings. 

2 Corinthians 5:17

New King James Version (NKJV)

¹⁷ Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

See Ya' Next Year!!!!!!!!

{Friday Letters} ♥ The Last Friday of the Year

Dear Friday Letter,
They like you! They really like you!!!
LOL.

Dear Friday,
Thank you for being here. You are the last one of this year.... I am ready for this week to be over. Just a little anxious for 2013..no offense 2012...but honestly.... you are in the past...You gave me an AMAZING year but your time is up.
Thank you for the memories....see you next Friday in 2013!!!! ::insert happy dance here::

Dear Me,
THIS IS IT. Your time to shine!!!!  2012 was great but 2013 will be better!!! Don't give up. Remember that your FAMILY, the people who sit with you on Friday night and hold your hand on Sunday morning those are the people you are working with to make this life amazing!!!! God is with you every single step of the way so let's do this!!! NO fears. No worries. JUST MOVE ON. Move forward. Pray. Love. & laugh more often...your Hubby is really funny!!! Remember though to slow down. Take time to hug and kiss your little ones they will never be this little again. Tell your Momma and Dad how much you love them, and appreciate EVERYTHING that they have done for you and given you in life. EVERYTHING. Remind your siblings that you LOVE them, you started this life with them and you need them.
Love you.
P.S. The weight. I promise it will come off....but what if we get preggers again...we shall see. God will know. :)

Dear Life,
Hmmm, reevaluating you right now. So be warned!
To new beginnings.

Dear Hubby,
Thank you so much for my new camera! I abso-love it. You are the absolute best!!! It came just in time we have a whole new year ahead of us and I can't wait to start taking pictures of EVERYTHING we do!!! I will put my camera to good use!
Love you bunches!!!!

Dear kids,
You guys are great. It's been fun this week being home with both of you. I get the best of both worlds and you know what..it's a lot easier than I thought it would be. Thank you for making my life complete. We start a new year together in a few days...all I can say it, I love you. A lot.
Yo'Momma.

Have a great weekend everyone!!! 

{Hello December} 2012 to 2013

{Good-Bye November}

December is that you? Wow.

The last 11 months are a blur. It's cold now, sometimes. My Husband graduated college, I became a "Stay@HomeMomma", kinda. It just doesn't feel like a whole year has gone by but my son's jacket no longer fits him and my daughter has new boots...that she is walking in, all on her own. So, yes. The year has gone by. Too fast and without warning.

My wish for December. That I can enjoy it. Maintain some peace. And, move forward. I am not sure where this year has led you but for me, it's given me a second chance. A new opportunity to start over. So, my 2013 starts now. Why wait?

I don't watch football but while listening to the news the other night one of the players said; "I don't think about the last play, I think about my next play." All, I could think was, "Wow, I want to be that way." I don't want to think about the past and what went wrong, I want to look towards the future and what's to come.

I often sit and think about the things that I wish could have happened or that I could have done differently. But, I can't dwell on the material and superficial. I can't think about places and situations. I can only move on.

2012 was a great year. Many things went well. But, I want 2013 to be even better for us.

{December prayer: Dear Lord, give me peace and faith to continue. Give me strength and wisdom to prosper.  Give us health and continued safety. Bring us to the end of the year with new hope. I pray that 2013 is an amazing year for Team Gomez and all of our friends and family. May Your will be done in my life and not mine. In Jesus Name. Amen.}


p.s. Still no pictures ya'll, maybe tomorrow....... Because I have a fun Holiday Mini-Photo shoot that my lovely assistant and I did! 

Oh, CHRISTmas Tree ♥

This year our Christmas tree isn't overflowing with presents. And, no we are not trying to teach our children a lesson, they are too little to understand. This year God has decided that as adults, my Husband and I, should learn about Love, FAITH, and having one another.

My Hubby has never really been one to worry about presents anyway, me on the other hand... I wasn't always that way... times are hard and people struggle. God knows our hearts and what we really need in our lives, or who we really need in our lives.God has provided for us in the most amazing manner. And given us the best friends any couple could wish for... 

This year God has been good to us. A new baby girl to spend Christmas eve with, a Hubby who is ALMOST done with school, and new job to better support my family. I have slowly learned that Christmas..and life in general is not about the gifts you receive but about the type of Blessing  you are... 

Just the other night...I handed a man at a gas station $7.00 {It's all the cash I had. It was cold. And he was standing outside the gas station  with his 2 young daughters and teenage son. I saw this man being humbled and not ashamed to reflect need....times are hard., he simply said..."God Bless you ma'am." It filled my heart and the tears didn't stop... 

I hear of so many families who lose their little ones for various reasons, of marriages that can't conceive and pray every night for a child, of parents who intentionally hurt their children and themselves, and I look at my two special little Blessings and my heart is OVER flowing.... 

Marriages that fall apart or are in crisis, Husband's and Wives that cheat on one another, or are disrespectful to each other...and sitting next to me is an Oger to the world and a soft mushy bear to ME...my heart has been complete.....

This Christmas I am Blessed. And, I have learned that it doesn't matter what you receive as long as you are a Blessing to others...nothing else matters...

To be Humble, Self-less, Forgiving, Merciful, Loving and Faith-filled... That is my Blessing.. 

I pray that EVERYONE has an amazing 

and most Blessed Christmas eve... 

and a FAITH-FILLED CHRISTMAS DAY! 

FROM TEAM GOMEZ WITH LOVE! 

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

{A Change in Pace...Kind of?}

So, changes are about to come. {Personally, Career wise, Blog-wise, Family-wise!}



Not sure how, or IF they will even affect my Blog. I love Blogging. As you all know I am NOT a Stay-@-Home Mom like most Momma Bloggers ::insert highly disappointed face here::. I have an outside the home government job.

Recently that outside the home job has become a bit more hectic as I am changing departments and well life will be a bit different. We will also be well into a new semester in a few weeks here and Ricardo's BUSY school & work schedule will be CRAZY!

Again, not sure how or if it will affect my Blog but I hope you stick around...see what's new and tell your friends to join us. I have a feeling the fun is just about to begin!

I hope and pray that my change in pace is for the best and that I can continue to update you guys and feature new ideas and concepts as they become available. As well as share all the fun things that this semester bring us. I know some of you don't know..but my Hubby is a FT student and I usually think of our life in semesters. This is his last FULL semester...if all goes well and God willing he will only have ONE class left after December ...and then he will be a GRADUATE! Yay!!!

In the mean time we will see where our little lives take us and what God brings to them!

Again I hope you guys stick around and invite others to join us on this little crazy journey we like to call...LIFE!

Have a great week everyone!  

{Thankful Thursdays} LINK UP!

This week I am most Thankful for:











Paths Crossing {I have been faced with many new decisions this month and this week. So, it puts me at ease to know that other Momma friends/Bloggers are experiencing the same...challenges in decision making.... Thank You Ladies....your support, listening ears and advice make a world of a difference for this Momma!} 

Mother-in-Law { She watches my kids...for...FREE. 'Nuff said right? No. But wait! She watches them when I have late night meetings, she feeds them, she makes them laugh ::in.tears.now::, she protects them, she gets after them,she feeds them..and ME some nights, she bathes them, she plays with them, she changes them, she teaches them, she speaks SPANISH to them,she dances with them,she holds them, she give them quiet time, and guess what... she absolutely LOVES them!! I admit. Like anything else. Leaving my kids with anyone is difficult. And, my Momma heart filled with doubts as to if my Mother-in-Law could do this for me...she has a busy...BUSY household...but she does it so well...and I am SO BLESSED!}

Little Good-Bye's {Again, leaving my kids has been a Momma challenge that for months at a time has made me walk away in tears and doubt. But this week my son walks in my Mother-in-Laws house... sits on the couch, stands by the door or is held in Grandpa's arms and calmly says... "Buh-Bye" with a smile. My Momma heart sighs with relief and I walk away..still in tears but happy and at ease... Thank You Jesus for this answered prayer.}

Support {From my Husband, above all. From my Mom and my Sister. From my Cousins-in-law, my Hubby's younger cousins who are mine as well. From my Momma friends/Bloggers. From my friends as a whole. From my co-workers. From those in and out of my life....it's amazing. THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! I MORE THAN TRULY APPRECIATE YOU ALL. I LOVE YOU.} 

What are you most Thankful for this week??

{30 About 30}

[I've never been scared of numbers. Like 30. I embrace it. I love it. It means a lot. Age represents time well spent, wisdom and lessons learned. I love 30!]

Camila ♥ Month ONE {Yes already}

Emotions:

Depending on the day, I will tell you that, it's either AMAZING...or really realllllly difficult. I've had a much closer tab this time around on my emotional state than when I had Santiago. 

Some days are GREAT filled with amazing Blessed moments. And others, I want to sit and cry and feel like a total failure as Mother. 

I will say that having TWO children is just beyond my expectations and beyond the Blessings I thought I would have by the age of 30! 

Camila is a sweet and gentle contrast to our Super Boy Santi. She is definitely all that we will need to balance out this almost all boy home.

Recovery has been tough, but with her in my arms day in and day out...all I can say is Thank You God and this life is so worth it! 

Having another human being as my most loved responsibility, sounds scary and overwhelming, it can be, but to know that God has entrusted ME to watch over 2 of his little Angels, just blows my mind! I am reminded again that this selfish life that I once led is NO longer about me! It hasn't been for almost 2 years now. I can't even remember my selfish and self-centered stubborn ways, who has time to be so into themselves, I think this now. That's what having a child does to us, it's a constant reminder of maturity and how we used to be. 

They say that having a baby changes EVERYTHING. If you don't have children of your own, you have no idea {trust me, I know}, and when you do, you will remember me. If you do have children, then you know exactly what I am talking about! 

The responsibility. The Love. The commitment. The sleep-less nights. The Faith. The smiles. The hugs. The tiny beating hearts. The Blessing. The hope. 

It's all God given. 

I do complain. I am human. Again some days ARE REALLY DIFFICULT. But, that is just life in general. I wouldn't change any of my God given Blessings for the world. My husband, my children, their health, our love, our faith, our family, our friends, and the fact that we can share it all. 

Camila came unexpected yet so expected. She has truly completed our little family of 4. She has Blessed us in so many ways. She is a Blessing. And, we can't stop Thanking God for her and for Santiago. They are who we have waited for our whole lives to love. Thank You Jesus. You are good.

Highlights:

Hmmmm....where to start?

Camila is Camila. 

• She is very strong. 
• She is very loud! 
• She is very much Miss. Attitude according to her dad who swears she rolled her eyes at him at her birth when he announced that he was her dad!  If you know my husband. You know he is a riot! 
• She has definitely established ownership over her Momma. 
• She is growing very fast. 
• She is resting and gaining energy to keep up with her brother!  
• She is a night owl. 
• She loves to be held. 
• She loves to just look. 

Discoveries:

• I think by now she has discovered that older brothers can be mean..but they love sooo much! {Santi has slapped her 3 times...but after 3 time outs..he's is doing sooo much better!}

• I think she knows that her Daddy can't let her cry...so she cries extra loud when he is around. 

• I think she's discovered that when you sleep no one bothers you....HA. 

• She is just getting to know the world around her but I know the next month will literally be an eye opener for her!   

Momma Challenges:

• Recovering from my C-section.
• Coping emotionally with not being able to be around my son for about a week or so. 
• Coping with having to take care of TWO children; one who is SUPER active and the other who is completely dependent right now. 
• Recovering from my C-section...did I mention that..I am still NOT fully recovered..but praying EVERYDAY for healing. 
• Dealing with minimal sleep.
• Returning to horrible sleep patterns. 
• Having to take care of TWO children almost completely on my own after only a week and half of having had my C-section. {My husband wasn't working or in school when Santi was born..which was a HUGE help} 

Baby Challenges:

Adjusting to her new loud and busy home, her new brother, the Houston heat, and this world as a whole... 



Height:  As of her last Dr's visit she was 21 and 3/4 she was 20 inches at birth. 

Weight: As of her last Dr's visit she was 9lbs 2 oz she was 8lbs 14oz at birth.

Next doctor’s visit: May for her 2 Month check up.

 
What we are looking forward to: 

• Her personality to continue to shine through
• Her new discoveries
• How she starts growing and adjusting to life
• How she will interact with her brother
• For her to be a bit more alert, active and awake..ha. 
• EVERYTHING right now!

 

Camila Isabel's Journey {Cont.} ♥

Continued from Camila's Journey Part 1....

After I left the operating room, it's a bit of blur. I was heavily sedated and groggy. 

All I know is that I waited in the room alone for a couple of minutes and then the nurse, my husband, my mom and Camila all entered at once. 

God.

Faith. 

Family. 

Blessings.

Joy. 

Love. 

Patience. 

They all brought me here. To this moment. Of being a Mom. Of having children. Of having a son and now a DAUGHTER. 

I saw her little round face once more and truly, nothing else matters. The pain. Worth it. The wait. Worth it. The chaos. Totally worth it. 

I am now responsible for two tiny people, who lived in my womb for 9 months and were formed from within with His Love, His Grace, and our Faith. We knew that we wanted children. That we wanted a family. And now here we are. About to hold on to that life once more. 

The nurses first question; are you going to breastfeed? Despite all the pain, I quickly replied, YES! I wanted to hold and see her. I wanted to start loving her and showing her that I am here for her. No matter what. The way my mom has been here for me. 

It's all happiness and love. 

It was a long ride and, in the end a somewhat quick journey. But, she was finally here! Camila had arrived and nothing was going to stop her entrance into our lives. And, we are more than overjoyed with her here. 

The next 24 hours we had visitors and nurses come in and out of the room like they owned the place, Ha. But the most important visitor and moment came when Santiago came to meet his new baby sister...CAMILA ISABEL! 

It was exactly like I expected. He was ALL smiles, ear to ear. He was giddy and nervous. He knew this little someone had come to join us and he was happy and excited. Kissing her and giggling. He couldn't contain the emotions. Granted the jealousy and uncertainty that came days later was not fun but I know that deep down inside he knows of this new connection in his life. Someone who he will Love, and who will Love him, someone who he will protect and will protect him, someone who is like him and from the same place as him...my heart! 

I love my children. 

I love having them in my life at this very moment. It has taken A LOT for us all to get here but we are finally here, together. Meant to be. In love. With Faith. Blessed. 

Happy. 

Camila entering our lives has been amazing. I hope that she will find us as wonderful as we think she is. 

I know my past post were pain-filled and even bitter. But, it's all truth. Reality. I don't sugar coat and I want my children to know that yes I suffered, A LOT but that I wouldn't change it for the world. AND, I WOULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN, FOR THEM! 

That is life. 

Pain. 

Difficult. 

And REAL. 

All we can do is pray and move forward. 

 AND HERE SHE IS.....

How do you do?!

This is yet another post that has been in my edit section for days...{sound of pitter patter fills my hall leading to my computer room and a child stands staring at me with a mouth full of banana ready to land half chewed onto the carpet...and that's why the post is not yet complete...HA. JOY. Really it is. I love my reasons for being late on posting Blogs.}

The question is; How do you do? How will you manage with 2 kids? How will you manage with 3 or 4? 

Two weekends ago one of Ricardo's uncles came to our home. With 2 of his 4 daughters and his one son. Yes he has 5 children. I asked him. How do you guys do it with 5 kids? He said "The same that you did with one and now DOS." I thought. So simple. Yet SO true. 

I used to think Santiago was enough or as much as I could humanly handle.  Now, I have TWO? Granted Camila is only 3 1/2 weeks but she can be a handful as well, not as much as I anticipate she will be in a couple of months but still. I have managed for 3 1/2 weeks to make it. To get it all done and remain calm. 

Now, by NO means does this mean that you will come to a completely clean house and see fully groomed children or a Mom who is showered and ready for company. But, I manage. I overcome and move on! 

My family, I have stated several times is not perfect! We try our best to be at our best. That's what God wants from us. We are human. We will fail. We will have bad days. But amidst all those things...we are Blessed. We have one another. We love one another. We support one another. We are here. We share smiles and laughs. Hugs and kisses..... AND THAT, IS HOW WE DO! 

I love this new journey of my life. Filled with adventures and everyday mystery! Isn't that what we all seek in life to have fun filled days, expecting the unexpected! This moderate thrill seeker has definitely been satisfied with all that life has given her. 


I hope and pray that people don't see my post as negative or joy-less, because trust me..I am the happiest person you will meet despite tragedy and bad news... I make the best of every situation and above all LOVE. 


Life has been good to my Husband and I. No matter how much we could possibly complain, we try not to, but if we did, we couldn't complain as much as we could Thank God for all the GREAT-ness He has given us! 


THAT..IS HOW WE DO! 

We are AFTER ALL....TEAM GOMEZ!!!

Camila Update ♥

{Pregnancy Updates}

How Far Along: 36 Weeks

Size of baby: According to my doctor, Camila is measuring about 2 more than my actual gestation. Her current ESTIMATED weight is 7lbs 13oz. Big Baby! Ha. But, I am praying that she will remain healthy and active. And that I can carry her until the 38^th week, NOT MUCH LONGER LEFT! Only 1 week and 3 days…

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained between 10 and 11  lbs (Some weeks I lose it, not sure how! The weight not my brain…that I lose everyday…HA!)

Maternity Clothes: As of 30 weeks I was wearing my old maternity clothes { mostly jeans and pants and some shirts~} and no more regular clothes. My doctor was amazed that I was able to get away with regular clothes for that long! But I am in that place where I wear the same clothes week after week... and my shoes...well lets just say Thank God it's "spring" time in Houston..or I'd look ridiculous in flip-flops and sandals every where all the time...or maybe NOT this is Houston!

Gender: It's a girl!!! We already know this....and her name will be Camila.

Movement: She is still VERY active,Thank God, DAY AND NIGHT..I love it and feel very happy every time she karate chops me! Everyone loves staring at the belly as it moves and jumps with Camila’s movements.

Sleep: Sleep? What’s that? No really I am that point…where sleep is a wonderful luxury….even though I am not as big as I was Santi at this time …I am very uncomfortable and finding my goodnight spot is very difficult….but I manage…..

What I miss: My ENERGY for sure, my agility and the ability to bend over! As well as being able to eat like the guy from Man vs Food and not feeling like I may die or give birth! I also miss being able to blow my nose without gagging EVERY time and thinking that everything I ate the night before will end up on my shoe making me late for work...HA!

Cravings: Hmmm…. This week…. HAMBURGERS again! And Oooohhhh Enchiladas de mole...mmmmmm.... 

Symptoms: Exhausted. Inability to breath due to how big Cami is and that she is pushing all of my vital organs into my neck! In total waddle mode, lower back pain and yes...I have even started feeling contractions.....it's true. Around this time with my son I had what I like to call "contraction envy"..but not these days..now I am worried that I will go into labor at any minute..which is a bit nerve wrecking!

Best Moments so far:  My first fav moment was the day we found out we were having a girl, and now every time I go in for my weekly ultrasound they remind me that yep, she is a girl! It's so exciting every time....Also, I am not sure how much he actually knows what is going on in  my growing belly but I tell Santi to say Hi to the momma, he comes over, lifts my shirt {no matter where we are!} and kisses my belly! I love it!!!  Of course he also comes over to the belly smells it and with a wave of his hand over his face and his very distinct "stinky face" declares that momma and baby are yes..."stinky", it's HILARIOUS! My husband loves seeing my baby move around under my shirt everyday more and more..I think she is anxious to be here…we are ANXIOUS to meet her as well!!! He then yells in pain for me; "TELL HER TO STOP!"....as if I can flip a switch..HA.  

Updates about this week: This week is super prep week…Doctor is ready, I am ready…my house I pray will be ready for Cami’s arrival… overall..this week is just readiness…I  had my Baby shower this weekend that was lots of fun and a TRUE BLESSING!!!!

Also, I had  contractions for about a week and half now..... that I am now slowly but surly feeling. So, we shall seeeeee.

Momma Perks: Not having to worry too much about anything really…my husband does a good job despite having to work 30+hours a week and going to school full-time..he doesn’t allow me to stress too too much… I love people coming over and helping me out with Santi while I get things done around the house..and I love that I have had so much help for my baby shower from Ricardo’s sis and cousin (Thank You Ale and Erica! I would have lost my brains without you! And had been in tears the last month or so!) ..they have really really been GREAT! :D Not to mention my regular helpers; Nanielle, her sidekick Meagan and Mrs. MaryAnn, who loves to come over and not only stress me out about when I will go into labor but also does a great job at making sure Santi and I are ok! I love that my Mother-in-Law watches Santi for me cause some nights when I pick him up she has dinner cooked and ready to share with us!

I hope that we can finally start on Camila's nursery this week!!! I HAVE SAID THAT EVEN IF IT’S NOT COMPLETE BY MARCH 30^TH..I WILL NOT WORRY!

Just holding on....

To God...

To life...

To me...

To my family....

To my husband....

To my son....

To my daughter....

To my Faith....

To my strength....

To my sanity....

To moments.....

To my word...

TO HIS WORD.

The good Lord never said it would be easy..but He did say...He would NEVER leave me...or forsake me...that no matter who else wasn't there for me..HE WOULD BE...He has been...I trust.

I have Faith.

I love.

Thank you to everyone who has been there the last 35 weeks... I am almost there..Camlia is almost here...

and GOD IS EVERYWHERE.

I am sooo BLESSED.

I AM SOOOO READY.

I am soooo happy!

My life has been amazing the last 29 years, 9 months and 7 days...

I CAN'T ASK FOR ANYTHING MORE!

God is with me...

HE IS SOOO GOOD.

ALL THE TIME.

Holding on to HIM!

Santiago’s Journey. {Sept 2009}

{This Blog Post is from Nov 2009; after the birth of my son, BUT STILL VERY ACCURATE!}

It has been about 2 months since my last entry.

As you may have guessed I had my baby, Santiago Isaias. He is amazing and I want to share with the world what it has been like…the best way to introduce him is with his journey into this world….

First, I found a blog which I never posted from 9/4/09; it was pretty relevant at the time and could be an intro to what was to come…

[“Near the end”
Or so they say.

Since Sunday I have felt "uncomfortable", despite the promises made by the doctor’s office; "If you feel like something is just not right you call us!" I have not heard back from them in 2 days!

I went to my routine monitoring and ultrasound this week but was only left with more questions. At this point, I feel like the confusion is not helpful. But, I will have no other choice than to wait and see.

I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed and can't wait to leave work in a week. I have so much to do at home.]

And it ends… not sure where I was going with that but I know I was in utter despair and completely exhausted.  It’s true what EVERYONE says… when you come to the “end” it feels eternal!!!

The last couple of weeks, which really were NOT the last couple of weeks, because I was delivered 3 weeks early, but to me they were the much NEEDED last weeks… I could not have waited until October 9th to deliver and honestly as I told my husband and friends…neither could Santiago. He was ready, I knew it and he knew it. And thank GOD, my doctor knew it!

WITH THAT SAID….

It ALL started on Friday September 11, I had what would be my second to last doctor’s visit. I went in for a regular visit awaiting my last day at work which would be on Monday September 14th. But, with all the anxiety of getting it all over with and having my baby in my arms, I think I made myself sick! I had high blood pressure, excessive protein in my urine which was causing excessive and painful retaining of fluid which led to swelling. Once the doctor confirmed all of the above she simply stated “I want you on bed rest as of today.” I thought…impossible, I have one more week until I am induced and I need and have so much to do. But, she prohibited me from going back to work that day and from leaving my house except to see her or to go to the hospital IF I should go into labor. She ordered me to go home and to come back to see her for further monitoring on Monday with a 100% chance of being induced on Tuesday or Wednesday and an 80% chance of having a c-section, everything one week ahead of schedule.

For those of you who don’t know, I was already scheduled to be induced due to my gestational diabetes on the 21st of September but now I had further complications and everything was being moved up ONE WEEK!

Panic and anxiety came over me. Not about the delivery or my health or Santiago’s BUT I HAD SOOO MUCH TO DO! Everything else God was in control.  Relentless and worried I went to work to pick up some things and give my boss the notice that I had to be confined to a bed for the next 5 or 6 days, and then back  home.

The weekend passed and Monday was here.

I walked into my doctors office with a about a liter of urine, for protein sampling! Gave it to the nurse, had some blood draw and vitals taken. With that done it was more bad news, everything was still elevated and now I was looking to be induced as soon as the next day if a room was available. By the end of my visit around 10 am the OB/GYN coordinator and the doctor came rushing to me with smiles, "You are being admitted tomorrow night at 8pm."

The next day and half went by fast, after a mad dash for the finish line I was ready! With my bag was packed, my home as baby ready as it could be and “READY” physically, emotionally, and mentally we headed out. I wasn’t scared, just anxious and excited.


Picture taken by our good friend Buritica

{Tuesday September 15th 2009}

As we walked out, our good friend Ricardo B. took the final picture of us as a couple, we would return as a threesome..Lol. A “real family”, baby and all.  The ride to the hospital was peace. For a while, no words, just our hearts beating through our throats, louder than the cars and noise outside. Ricardo and I drove the 25 minute drive to the hospital almost silent, only expressing that we were scared as we held hands and prayed. Suddenly the sky was beautiful and the trees were greener than ever. We drove up to the hospital searched for the Labor and Delivery parking lot and parked.

We gathered our things and began the walk up to the hospital, along the way from the parking lot a couple with three children walked passed us, looking at me with my belly and bags in hand the lady turned to us and said

“Felicidades y Buena Suerte.” (Congratulations and Good Luck!)

With deep breaths and nervous smiles Ricardo and I said “Gracias”.

Not knowing what was to come we walked into the quiet lobby and up to the volunteer desk attendant. An older man in a red vest, “Can I help you?” I said, “Yes, I am here to be admitted into labor and delivery.” Being that he was a bit old he looked at me and said, “Oh let me call them and make sure.” He looked for the number, called and spoke to the nurse “A young lady is here to be admitted”, he then said “Oh they are waiting for you.” He gave us the most confusing instructions on how to get to the 5th floor labor and delivery area. Ricardo and I then walked to the elevators and up to the 5th floor, down the hall and to the registration desk. A nurse and patient account representative were waiting for us to begin all the paper work needed to have a baby. It was insane.  Not the paper work, but I was there to have A BABY!

After that I was taken to my room and instructed to strip down and dress in the usual blue hospital gown. The excitement and nerves were no longer there…I was simply living it.

One nurse came in and started the preparation process, an IV, some blood work, preventative medications, medical instructions and questions..lots of questions. The room was filled with medical equipment for both baby and myself, I felt like a lab rat. Being probed and poked to assure accuracy and quality of the highly anticipated experiment…LIFE! Buawhahahaha!

Then another nurse came in asking if I could donate the baby Blood Cord supply…lots more questions and poking.  About an hour after my arrival at around 8:45pm, the nurse walked up to me and said "ok, I am going to give you the medicine to induce you."

At this point everything, everything became so overwhelming and emotional. Was I really here, was everything ok after all those questions and tubes of blood, could Santiago make it out ok and if so would he be healthy and would I be ok? So much could go wrong, so much could happen. I was so emotional during my entire pregnancy and so much had gone on in such short amount of time that about 2 hours after I was induced I actually broke down. The nurse walked in and stated that because my blood sugar and blood pressure was so elevated I had to be further  be confined to my hospital bed on extreme medications and monitors.

I wanted to have a natural delivery with more than traditional methods and a Doula.

The nurse stated though that the only thing I could  do was lay there in bed, I would get a catheter and medications that caused me to be drowsy, so no more getting up to the restroom and my blood sugar would be taken every hour as well as my blood pressure. I didn’t and couldn’t believe that after all I had read and learned I would be having the most medically induced labor and delivery! Tears, snot, chills, sweats, disappointment, horrible uncontrollable feelings filled and took over my body. I had prepared for 9 months to have Santiago naturally, calmly, with my family and at his own time. But, from my arrival at the hospital so much was already wrong with me that I was immediately brought back to reality.

For the next 24 hours I was not only confined to a bed but probed, poked and attached to so much that a “normal or natural” delivery had been throw out the window long before it even had a chance to squeeze in. I cried, uncontrollably for about 5 minutes, my mom and Ricardo attempting to console me as I slowly regained composure. With all my Faith and prayer throughout the night I accepted anything and everything that was to come not for me, but for Santiago. He was all that mattered now. This life was no longer about me.



I was told that the drug given initially was less intense than what would come the following morning. Still all night I had cramps and irrepressible discomfort. Needless to say the night was not only uncomfortable and painful but sleepless as well. Yet the nurses somehow kept repeating that I should rest. It’s easier said than done.

Come 6 am, a new nurse, more medications, more needles and more blood work and the worse pain I have yet to feel. The breaking of my water and more contractions.

{Wednesday September 16th, 2009}

So, the new nurse was not only intense and unruly she was also very adamant about me having my baby as soon as possible. That didn’t make me mad, trust me, I wanted it all to be over as fast as possible as well. Because, despite the fact that the overnight contractions had been mild, they were still painful. And, now they were beginning to get stronger, closer and lasted longer. All signs that labor was well on its way. The morning hours seemed to become eternal as I waited for my OB/GYN to show her shining face at 8:30 am and break my water!

My morning seemed more painful than my night because the new nurse was all about changing positions while in bed!  Which would have made for a much more comfortable experience had I not been attached to every tube and needle in the hospital!  

So, I gracefully went with it, quietly and in pain waiting for that doctor to make my day…or so I thought!

And as planned and on time, unlike a doctor, at around 8:30 am, the much awaited and dreaded moment, Dr. Diase, came in to break my water. Probably the most pain I have ever been in, in my life. With no pain medication in my system, wanting to make the experience as natural as I could (laughing), I took some deep breaths and with fear and tears I got through it. Buckets of water poured out of me, as it was expected. After all I had been retaining excess fluid in every part of my lower extremities for about 2 weeks now caused by the Gestational Diabetes.  Swollen legs and feet, as well as an 8 lbs weight gain at the end of my pregnancy put me at about 200lbs at time of delivery; I calculate that about 20 of those pounds came gushing out onto that bed as water. After lots of pressure, a warm feeling; like when you wet the bed in your sleep as a child, comfortable and a sense of relief, the water was broken! It was only “a matter of hours” before the baby would be here. I should have started dilating pretty quickly and in no time we would be ready to push. 

Most of that day and all the “checkups” for lack of better words, are thankfully a blur.  I do remember lots of pain, lots of awkward breathing and everyone reminding me of the fact that there was pain medicine, as my family continued to fill the room and crowd over me. No embarrassment was felt because the pain overshadowed it. The day was long and all I wanted was to deliver.

The contractions felt as if my little man was making his own way out of my womb with some kind of invisible crafting knife he got for Christmas and my patience was quickly running out. No longer happy to be in the situation I remember being annoyed by my husband’s voice with his reassuring comments and comforting touch. I wanted to slash his neck and pull out his kidneys so that he knew what I was going through. Again, all else is a blur (because it’s true once you deliver you forget it all!).

It was now about 6pm, and I had been in labor for about “oh a mere 22 hours or so” of which the last 10 had been pretty intense to say the least. And before the doctor came back to check on me, I decided that at that point, I was done. I need the good stuff and I don’t mean illicit drugs, I mean the really good stuff! Immediate relief and a real walk on the clouds came for the next 24 hours; numb, no feelings, all was pink and fluffy bunnies and the answer to all my problems was “YES”.  True this landed me in the least and far from natural experience of labor and delivery but I had to, I love my son but enough was enough. And without knowing what was to come or how much longer Santiago could torture his mother, I did it. I had to do it, “they” told me to do it. I had become a sellout, a less than woman, and half bread if you will, with no regards to the possible side effects of what all that medication could cause my unborn child or me. But, the pain was so intense I could have yanked my eyes out and thrown then at the doctor. But, with a couple of deep breaths and long pointy needle to my spine, all gone! I wouldn’t practice my self-control, reach my happy place or have controlled breathing sessions with the hubby but you know what NO MATTER how I DID IT…I did it!

At around 6:30 maybe 7, the doctor came into my room to check on my “progress”. She really is a sweet woman, tall, thin and with two little ones of her own. After my epidural she could have chopped off my finger one by one and I would have loved her just the same. She didn’t….the verdict? Well, after 24 hours of labor I had dilated to about a 6, maybe a 7! If you are a woman with children…now is when you gasp for air and feel not only pity for me but utter understanding. A “Bless your heart” is in order.

What did this mean…in short….I was getting NO WHERE! After my water had been broken I should have dilated about a centimeter an hour but it had been almost 12 hours, you do the math. After all that pain all I could think was “ARE YOU KIDDING ME!” The doctor then went on to say… “The baby is head down but face down in the birth canal (baby’s should be face up when they are delivered, for their safety), so he is no longer safe to come out this way!”…ooohhh did I mention that only 30 minutes before I had decided to get my epidural, do we remember that, yeah well! The doctor then decided that they would attempt to “manually”, yes manually flip the baby around. At this point my legs were like noodles and my body was exhausted. And, as all the nurse power prepared to perform this process, they also quickly realized that at 200lbs and pumped full of epidural I was not gonna budge. (By the way, I had been at the hospital so long I had now gone through almost FOUR shift changes! Not even noticing when the last one had left, the current nurse was also pregnant and by the looks of it…she could have had her baby before me and with my luck she would have shoved me off the bed and said “blop” here is my baby HAHA! And run off…end scene).

By this time things began to go completely downhill, I started to feel really cold and began to tremble beyond control. I started feeling a burning sensation all over and the nurses and doctors quickly brought in an anesthesiologist, my worst nightmare was occurring, my epidural was running out. I was starting to feel pain again, God forbid and I just wanted this to end. The nurses stopped trying to move me and covered me in blankets. Then the doctor uttered those fearful words, subconsciously I had wished she said them hours before, “Emergency C-section”, they were heaven sent.

A new phase, we now had to wait, there were THREE, THREE other “Emergency C-sections” ahead of me so it was now about 8pm. The medical staff at one very busy maternity ward had exhausted all possibilities with me and as if planned everything had NOT turned out exactly as I imagined or as naturally as I would have wished BUT now after 24 hours of labor, I was steps away from being a mommy! At last.



Then after about an hour of waiting (now 9pm) the doctor came in, “ohhp, we have a cancelled C-section and you are next.” (Always with a smile, she really is sweet and I always felt as if she sympathized with my pain and waiting.) I was in and out of my own little madness caused by the epidural so I vaguely remember that trip to the OR; I know I was prepped and reeled into surgery. I remember being placed on the surgery bed, being told the process that I would go through, and being asked questions. Then after about 20 minutes of being told that there was cutting and lots of pressure going on the doctor said “ok, we are ready for dad.”  

This meant they had cut through all the layers of fat, past scar tissue from my previous surgeries, into my uterus and were ready to detach that life that for the last 9 months had depended solemnly on my body. There would be no more monthly visits to the doctor’s office to hear our baby’s heart beat through my belly. No more prenatal checkups or testing. No more classes to be taken in preparation for our big day. The baby showers were REALLY over this time. {Ha.} The anticipation of WHEN, was NOW. No more wondering what or who he really looked liked, despite the doctors and nurses attempts to say he looked like his father in those blurry black and white pictures. No more weekly ultrasounds and monitoring where Ricardo would sit in a big comfy chair watch “Regis and Kelly” or “the View” and pass out while I sat strapped to machines listening attentively to assure that Santiago’s heart is beating and his movements are consistent. No more late night belly talks, prayers, tears or fears that he wouldn’t make it this far. His kicks through my stretched skin which reassured me every time I felt sick or overwhelmed will now be felt with full force (not that they weren’t before!) with his tiny feet in the flesh. Those sleepless nights, that I complained so much about, when his butt or head were wedge up against my lungs or kicks and punches caused my bladder to explode, would end here. Now when we lay in bed, thinking “what is he doing?!” we will know! No more nausea and heartburn supposedly caused by his hairy little head. This was it.

During the surgery the anesthesiologist asked me if I could feel anything, and at some point he would give his magic wand a pump and tah-dah, pain no more.

Ricardo finally appeared through those OR double doors, camera in hand, and wearing those blue paper scrubs and face mask, for those of you who know my husband, he is easily grossed out and very scared of this type of situation. I could through my daze sense his fear and could almost hear his body tremble and shut down in disbelief.  As I laid there, loopy and split open like a dissected lizard ready to become a mom, Ricardo clenched to the camera as if it were going to erase the experience and send us forward (or backward) 10 years, the moment was here. After only minutes of tugging, pulling and pushing (the doctors, not me!) at about 9:27pm…those words…the culmination of 9 months, “Wow, he’s a big BOY!…A really big boy!” and then through gurgling cries, the sound of water being pumped out of his mouth, then louder cries…MY SON…Santiago Isaias Gomez, he was here, in this world, ready to be loved and seen. His arrival was short of spectacular and he sure knows how to build up the anticipation causing so much suspense and yes, DRAMA! (If you know him now…he is not patient and he will bring on the drama if need be!)

For several minutes all I could hear was shuffling around, lots of tennis shoes speedily getting my baby cleaned, weighed, checked, wrapped and ready to be loved, the doctor had allowed my husband to cross into the OR and take pictures and seconds seemed like years! Finally HE emerged from behind the blue curtain a bundle with a little puffy, chalk white face his body wrapped in the usual hospital receiving blanket like a glow worm and his head covered with a tiny pink and blue beanie.

He was in my eyes perfect and best of all HEALTHY!

Because I was delivered so early the thought was that he would not be coming home with us and would have to be in the NICU for about 1 week to make sure his lungs were fully developed but by the looks and sounds of everything he was perfectly healthy. I had never worried about this, because I knew that God would not make us wait any longer to start our lives together. With tears in his eyes and the sound of his heart beating through his throat, his hands still trembling, not sure of what we just did, Ricardo with a cracking voice and a smile on his face said, “You wanna giv’em a kiss?” He brought him near and with the bit of strength left in my body I shed some tears, kissed my baby and passed out for the remaining of the procedure on the surgery table! I was EXHAUSTED and anxious to feel better. As I began to shake uncontrollably again and was prepped to go to the recovery area all I can remember is the exhaustion.

What I know is that Ricardo ran that victory lap with Santiago as they were photographed more than Jon and Kate on their worse days. The hall was filled with paparazzi aka my family. I was reeled off to recovery and later visited by Ricardo and my parents. All I knew was that this part….was over. (It makes me tear up thinking about it all over again.)…. It was a looooooong journey! Very trying BUT YES….SOOOOOOOOOOO WORTH IT!



And it’s not true that you forget about it all once the baby is here….well at least not in my case.  Yes the last 9 months had been erased but those last 24 hours still very vivid in my failing mind and worn out body.  But now, I had to be stronger than before, recuperate and move forward, there was now a beautiful baby boy to care for! And again…my child is not very patient! 

After this around maybe uhm 11:30pm or midnight I was taken to my hospital room and formally introduced to my son.  And then….a whole new me emerged. The nurse asked if he should take Santiago to the nursery to which I wanted to say "are you crazy lady didn’t you just see them rip this child from my body and now want me to let him go…uhmmm no!" He was almost immediately attached to my breast for the feeding and diapers and tears started flying everywhere!

We were to remain in the hospital for the next three days, filled with lots of getting used to, lots of visits and frustration. The next day after my delivery I was forced to stand up and get out of bed, when I made it over to the mirror all I could think was “I look horrible and I feel like a train just ran me over, stopped and said oh wait I missed a spot…and then backed up and ran me over again.” My body was limp, my insides where sore, my soul had been lifted and I felt as if I were having an outer body experience. Is it hard and painful to have a baby? HECK YES! Is it worth it and would I do it again? If GOD allows me to…In a heartbeat!  Not soon though! Not soon.

Thank you to EVERYONE who not only made this last year an awesome one but also put up with my pregnant self!