Wednesday, October 10, 2012

{Difficult Decisions....} Parte Dos

After my Hubby and I decided what was best for us.... I started thinking of how and what to say to whom. I decided that an initial email would be sent to my boss on updates and how I felt and what the doctors had stated and what I thought would be the next step...

I was off from work for about a week.

When I went back I had one conversation with my boss, the tears flowed and feelings emerged. I knew that I had made the right decision for my family and for my department despite the timing of it all and the what-if's in my mind, I moved forward. My next conversation would give me total peace and convert my decision into reality. Our department Director, a man, an almost Father-like figure. His reference included his own daughter, also a Momma and wife... his own marriage and an agreement him and his wife made when they first were married, and finally a book.... a chapter and how it ends.... with a Woman who cares for her family in a very distinct manner. Our conversation one of wisdom, peace and faith. Very appropriate and very settling. He gave my decision further meaning and purpose. He gave my decision direction which is exactly what I needed....

Sometimes we  have made up our minds on what needs to happen when God knows it should have happened a long time ago. He was just better building and preparing us for it. I am scared. My decision was tough and now I must move forward.... I can't stay in this place where I think I belong... God knew where my real place would be long before today and long before I thought I knew...

Decisions like this are difficult... but life goes on... 

The book and that final chapter about a Woman who maybe didn't know how or when but she knew God wanted her to follow Him every step of the way.... I know that nothing is impossible...

My Director said to me... "she did this all from home...."

To me home has always been where my heart is... 

Proverbs 31 (NIV) 

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character
10 [b]A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.


De Su Mama said...

Oh my goodness Connie, I am so sorry to hear about your ordeal!!! And, honestly, as I sit here at 5 am after being up since 2 am for the second day in a row, I want to thank you for showing me the possibility of what might be if I don't take better care of myself. In any case, I am proud of you for making the hard decision and look forward to your new path and success. Mucho amor, amiga.

Connie Leon said...

Thank You! And yesss. It is so real and I don't wish it on anyone else! Especially us Momma's with little babies to care for on a daily basis. Not to mention the kind of scary situation that it is for our Loved our Hubby's and parents. Please rest and take care of yourself... our families need us! :D