::Building Your Blog Tribe:: Do's & Don'ts

{All pictures are from my Momma of Dos, blogging 101 class last week... #BlogVisionTribe}

I've been blogging for nine years, like before it was "in" to blog, I blogged. It's a story I often tell in my Blogging 101 workshop. In 2008, I went from writing blogs on Myspace to Wordpress. Then in 2009, I moved over to the Blogger platform. Momma of Dos has been around for some time. And it always surprises me to think back and look at how far I have come.  Some of the only reasons I have made it this far are due to the guidance and friendships that I made early on in my blogging career.

By 2014, my blogging journey took on a life of its own called the Houston Latina Bloggers {HLB}. It was important to me to start building a tribe and create a space where I could turn around and help new bloggers. My goal was to provide all the resources that weren’t available in the blogging space years ago and pass on the knowledge that I had gained. Co-founding HLB was a labor of love and continues to be. The women who helped me shaped the group into what it is today have played an integral part of the blogging resources HLB is now able to offer its members. HLB could not have grown and succeeded without the women who supported my efforts, offered their guidance, and worked hard alongside me to get the group up and going. In 2015, we kicked off an active group and created our own #LATINATRIBE. 

The group continues to grow and evolve; and after nearly two years of work, our vision is beginning to take shape. It has taken consistent work, dedication, and time. As the group grows, our process takes on new shapes and dynamics. New bloggers have new and innovative ideas which have brought HLB to the forefront of the blogging community. And through all the sacrifice and difficulties, the rewards have been worth it. 

In return, I have learned a lot. These days I share my experiences with women who attend my Blogging 101 class.

Here are some things I have learned you should and shouldn't do!

Do-

1) Provide Support & Guidance.

Sharing contacts, advice and giving likes and comments on social media may all seem like common courtesy for a tribe who is also doing the same for you. Right? Well, even if you don't receive the same amount of support, you show your support anyway. Why? Because at the end of the day you want to do all you can to help and know that you did your best.  It's probably one of our biggest rules in the group. It’s important. VERY.

You cannot be a taker and not give back. Or not give because you fear others will take too much. It's life. Things aren't fair. I tend to overshare but that's just me. You have to when you have years of knowledge. I must. I was once a new blogger and had no clue what to do. If it weren't for ladies like Alba of Independent Mami who ALWAYS offers great resources and is just a giving person, I would not have made it in the blogging world.

Which at the end of the day is just as cut-throat as any other business. **So don't be fooled. It is a serious income-providing business for many. Competition is bound to happen.  You just have to know when to give in.  

2) Build a personal relationship with those in your tribe.

You cannot be in-it to win-it if you don't have close personal friends in your tribe. Just like in life, you need the love and true friendship of like-minded women, mommas, writers, creatives and entrepreneurs who can have your back. The only way to know who does is by truly learning about the women in your tribe-who they are, their families and what drives them. This way you can form a true lasting connection or partnership with them.

3) Trust.

There are some levels of trust that need to be had when dealing with new people. I understand we all have different life experiences and our ability to trust is not as easy to some as it is to others. I trust too much, too fast, sometimes. I trust based on feeling or vibe. With that said, some people just click, or connect instantly and others may not. All is good though, some instant connections might not be long-lasting and some that take longer to connect, sometimes result in some of the best friendships or working relationships. I think it's like this with life in general.

4) Give Credit where credit is due.

You didn't do this on your own; if you did, kudos but, more than likely you didn't do this on your own. Had I not met certain bloggers early on, I probably would not have made it. The set of bloggers that I met in 2012 at my first LATISM conference were pivotal. I will be forever grateful for the role they have played in my journey. It is important to me to credit and give shout-outs especially to those content creators who share this space with me.

5) Be nice.

It's common courtesy, right? Being nice to people, although we won't always agree or connect with everyone but being respectful of others, their ideas and their content is just common sense. You don't want to burn bridges at any point that might be helpful or a resource just because you don't agree with others. I am not saying don't voice your opinion or be yourself.

Simply treat others how you would like to be treated. TRUST me, I know it’s easier said than done. I am not perfect. I've rolled my eyes when people start talking when I have strong conflicting feelings. You don't have to get along with everyone in the blogosphere. That's normal. With that said, just be a nice person and continuously courteous, simple rule.

And, in no way am I saying to be fake. If you do not agree with a group or how they think and you don't think you ever will, well then remove yourself from that situation. It's very easy.  Much like in life, if it doesn’t grow you, let it go.

Don't-

1) Make Assumptions.

Communicate. Communication is highly important with online relationships. I would say if you don't understand something, or feel like something needs to be cleared up, Speak up. I'm one who can personally say that because I shut down, I have lost friendships over miscommunication. So, if you have to call or meet in person to clear the air and talk things out, do it! Don't assume that a certain tone or emotion is attached to words. Talk it out and know if your feelings are being validated. Again, if the situation at the end of the day is not what you expected, you have every right to walk away. but give it a chance. I would suggest talking, listening, and communicating.

Again, if things are not clear, talk about it, with time and patience.

2) Be overly-guarded of your space.

I get it. We all have insecurities and or a certain space that we like to protect. But in this business, if you don't share and put yourself out there, well then you won't grow. Most bloggers live and dream to have exposure, to be well known, I know I do! That won't happen if you are always in your own guarded and secret space. Some of us are super shy. Again, that's life, you can't grow if you keep to yourself and never share. You must let go of that guarded space and be yourself, people will love your open and honest content.

3) Use People.

Of course, we all know this right. I know a lot of bloggers in different groups complain about people who only come into their lives for a connection or contact. And, I get it, it's not right. I think that as long as you give credit and are respectful toward one another, sharing contacts and connections is acceptable.

In HLB, we want all the bloggers to grow so sharing is encouraged and applauded. I may not know all the ladies personally but we are part of the same community and at the end of the day I want them to grow. Their success is HLB’s success.

You don't want to be known as the person who never shares other bloggers’ posts, or likes, or comments but comes to the party when opportunities are being shared. It looks bad and although HLB doesn’t have a set rule on this, we do encounter these situations sometimes. People get upset and don’t want to share if they feel used. So show your tribe some love.

4) Be jealous- there’s enough to go around for everyone.

It's a natural thing to be jealous or have a feeling of being left out of something if you share too much. Don't be. I know it might not seem like it but trust that there is enough work for everyone. We are all content creators but our styles, perspective and experiences are vastly different. Don't worry about there not being enough opportunities. I've learned that the more you stay in your lane and do your own thing, the more opportunities will come your way.

Just trust me on this one. There is always enough. Don't worry about everyone else and what they are doing. Focus on you and you will not have time to look around and be jealous. No need. No time.

5) Be fake.

That's all. Don't. Be yourself. People can see straight through you if you're fake. Plus, the things that aren't true and perfect about you will come out when people see you in person and realize that your online life is just a front. You don't want to ruin your brand like that. We are human not perfect or picture ready 24/7. So be real guys.

SPONSORS FOR MY BLOGGING 101 CLASS HELD ON WEDNESDAY AUGUST 9TH:

Location: ONLY LOVE REMAINS by ISABEL SHAW

SWEET TREATS: Madre T Sweets by Maria Tolentino 

::Blogging 101 Workshop:: at Thinking Girls Boutique

About the blogging journey..... 

When I started blogging in 2008, as my own personal improvement project to simply practice my writing skills, I couldn't imagine what it would become. I have long since left my job at Harris County Elections as part of their communications and outreach department but Momma of Dos has become one of the best personal improvement projects ever. As the year continued, Barack Obama became president and my inspiration grew. 2009 came and I became pregnant with my first son. My pregnancy was not easy. I quickly found myself expressing my pains, feelings, cravings and everything in-between and discovered, "mommy bloggers". 

 {Picture Credit: All pictures taken by Chris Pozo of Lex Photography} 

Soon after I had my son I realized I had become severely depressed during my pregnancy, since the depression "went away" when my son was born, I left it alone. 10 months after my son was born, I found out I would be having a second baby. This time a girl. And, that's how Momma of Dos was born. A new onset of depression began and this time it lingered past the first year after her birth. I continued to share and the sense of community became my free therapy. 

In the Summer of 2012, I could no longer hold it together. I went to therapy and eventually had a panic attack in the fall of the same year. I landed in the hospital and was sent home to rest, I quit my job and decided I would refocus and take some time off. During this time I attended my first ever blogging conference, LATISM here in Houston. My blog would once more grow. In 2013 I returned to work full-time this time more relaxed and with more motivation to keep blogging. I have since been part of various campaigns local and nationwide as well as have been invited to several conferences both local and out of state, even made it to Washington DC last year! 

Blogging has never been my full-time job, as a Momma/Wife with a degree, I have chosen to work outside the home and pursue a career which would match my education efforts. I work in Corrosion and that's pretty much all I share on here about my real job. 

Blogging is a side-gig which has afforded me MANY experiences and at times extra income that is very much welcomed! 

Fast forward to 2016, when I decided to host Blogging 101 classes partnered with Thinking Girls Boutique as the venue. The rewards of sharing  my journey, my work, and how to create your own blog for various reasons have been immense. I have met so many people from all walks of life. Those who just want to share their story of motherhood, of life, or their experiences to those who  are looking to enhance their small business' advertising/promotion strategy and exposure.

I love what I do and growth and change have allowed me to pursue passions I really didn't know I had.... 

 {Picture Credit: All pictures taken by Chris Pozo of Lex Photography} 

#LATISM15 Conference Recap

                     ::Momma Disclosure:: This is a compensated post. All statements are my true and honest opinion. 

There is something powerful about a large group of Latino's who come together. Trust me I have experienced it first hand. We have filled the U.S. Capitol and stood firm against the rain, united. It's what LATISM did to us. Brought us all together, both Latina's and Latinos into one city to be heard as one voice. Not of anger or filled with fighting words but educated, informed and knowledgeable about what we believe in. I didn't know what to expect, I was scared to voice my opinion, then we convened the first night. After which I was asked by another conference attendee to join forces with her and bring more strength to our cause, women rights. Especially against violence, against deportation, against separating families. 

I know that we didn't come together in DC to prove anything but instead to learn how we can further reach our communities and grow to help our causes. My cause was simple, women rights and more specifically, equality for moms. But, it reaches so many areas; equality for women in general, women rights as a whole, women empowerment, immigration, rights in the workplace, accessible and affordable dependent care and so much more.  Which is why when I was selected to attend the conference, I immediately accepted. Not to prove that I could do it but to do more, to learn more, to become more noticed and to further voice what I truly believe.

LATISM provided the perfect platforms and increased the power I felt, as each moment continuously inspired me. Inspired to speak up, to become involved again, to be informed in my own city and never give up! The conference had so many areas of interest and covered a long list of important topics you can see them all here but today I am sharing my favorite top 10 take-away's from the conference.  

1) Meeting New Bloggers- While I know many amazing bloggers who have inspried me along the years. Each conference helps me create a broader base of support and new found sources of inspiration and ideas. Meeting new bloggers, writers and thinkers creates new collaborations and brings out the best in everyone. Meeting new people helps me think of new and fresh ideas. Plus meeting new people is always good for personal growth.

2) Meeting up with other Texas bloggers- You would think that when you belong to specific groups it's easy to keep up with one another. But, Texas is huge and bloggers are spread out, throughout the state. Keeping in touch, meeting up or even catching up with some of us can be tricky. We all live different lifestyles and have conflicting schedules. Getting us together even at conferences can be difficult but in DC, I enjoyed the company of some Texas bloggers. And, finally got to meet more of them in person. Which is always special!

3) Visiting the local sites- While the conference kept us very busy, we were able to get away in small groups or large ones to enjoy the local sites. Oh yes, and the eateries. The food was great! Visiting the local sites to me is very important. You learn so much about the city, and it allows for more time to get to know the other conference attendees. While you don't want to miss out on the conference, who can resist getting out and exploring? DC was a first for me, so I did have a short site seeing bucket list. I was able to visit my top 3; the White House, the Capitol and the Lincoln memorial.

4) Shopping- I am usually not into shopping, but being that I was visiting DC for the first time and that my children are huge presidential fans. It was a must. It was nice to take a moment from the conference and really think about the small things that would make my children happy. They loved their gifts and I loved seeing their reactions. They now have a little memory from a special place where their Momma has been. It's the small things that count. I brought back t-shirts for my parents and trust me they were ecstatic. That again makes me happy and feel a small sense of accomplishment.

5) Connecting- Being a Momma can sometimes make me feel like I don't get out much and like maybe I lack in networking encounters. But, conferences like LATISM make me feel different. Connecting with others, especially brands and large companies is a good way to update and practice my personal brand pitch. It's also a great way to feel connected to something other than your small hometown circle. And, it's definitely a good way to get your company or blog recognized.

6) Giving back- One thing I have always been about is giving back. Within my local community and within my network as a whole. Feeling as if all that you have learned is being used for good. As well as giving back to fellow bloggers for all their support in form of mentoring and sharing my experiences. LATISM gives back, in so many ways but most importantly to the Latino Community. That's so important, as a group we should give back to one another to form and create bigger and better networking circles that we can all learn from. 

7) Work in the community- I love the work that is being done in the community, with the youth especially. Sharing the diverse passion we have for all causes with the young Latino community is amazing. LATISM is definitely working within our communities for a better future. Who better to help lead the way than the youth who form part of the inner-city or under-represented rural communities. To have a group like LATISM step in and want to make a true difference in education is a great step forward.

8) STEM & Congress visits- There are so many areas of science and technology; that I still don't understand and should. There are areas of our government that I still don't understand, and most definitely should be involved in. LATISM has reignited my interest, as a parent in these subjects. Most importantly in STEM and how much our children should be involved in different areas of focus. Math and Science are vital to many areas of our lives. I want my children to learn as much as they can and reach their potential in any or all areas of focus. I feel that I should be more involved, especially for my daughter, I want to help make a way for her to study anything that she wants and succeed. 

9) The Team- Putting together a large event is not easy. Bringing together all of the logistics, people and topics can be a hard task to accomplish. But, the LATISM team accepts the challenge and takes it on. At the end of the day, everyone gains. The experience is exciting and one to learn from. I commend all those involved, and appreciate all of the hard work. 

10) Traveling Alone- I recommend it for all Momma's. Especially if you are like me. I didn't get to travel alone much as a young adult. I either traveled with my family or my Husband (while we were dating and newly married). So traveling alone, being in a new city alone, and sleeping without my kids and husband was very new to me. Not something I was used to. But, as I have gone on several trips now it's definitely a good break from the norm. It also helps me appreciate and miss my family, even more. The experience is very unique and helps remind me as a Momma that I am capable of so much more. It's a wonderful reminder really!

:: 3 things to know Before attending a Conference:: #LATISM15

                               ::Momma Disclosure:: This is a compensated post. All statements are my true and honest opinion. 

                                                All pictures taken by:  Andy Ramirez  http://www.andyphotographer.com/

Last week, as you all may know, I attended LATISM. It's one of many conferences I have been to. You would think that I know what I am doing, right? Well, as I left DC Friday night the shoulda, coulda, woulda was starting to settle in. Thinking about the many more connections I could have made and how much more I should have prepared for the conference. Immediately made mental notes as to what I should do differently next time. Because, there are always other opportunities to make good connections. Here are ::three:: things I think are important to know, before you attend your next networking event or conference.

1) Review the agenda 

One thing I like to do is review the agenda before the event. It will give you information about times, location and what will be discussed. The amount of information can be overwhelming, but being prepared helps ease the stress. I try to remain on a single track and attended the sessions I know  will be interesting to me. But,  I also like to attended sessions a bit out of my scope and learn something new. Before you attend your next event, review the agenda. Know the times and where your sessions are located so you can plan accordingly and select topics not only that you know but those you can learn something new from.

2) Make a list of companies, brands or contacts you want to connect with at the event

Most events have group pages on Facebook where they disseminate information or list their sponsors on their websites. It is smart to review the list carefully. Know who you want to connect with and more importantly make sure that the brand fits your blog. I understand wanting to connect with big companies and brand names but at the the end of the day, if it doesn't fit your blog, the partnership really won't last. I was able to connect with a couple of personal blog contacts, I have followed certain blogs for years and wanted to meet some of the ladies behind those blogs. I did also make great new connections with brands who want to work with Latina's in Houston. Having a defined brand and knowing what you are seeking long-term is very important. Some brands knew me because of my time in the business. And, I connected with others because I knew exactly what I wanted to say to them. Being prepared is important, in all instances.

3) Relax and Enjoy

Being unprepared causes for a lot of missed time and running around. Which is why being organized and knowledgeable before the event is important. And, at the end of the day, yes, you gain valuable lessons, important contacts and great new partnerships. But, if you didn't have fun and enjoy your time, it becomes point less. You don't want to be burned out during an event or conference the frustration can show and you can miss a good opportunity to interact with others. If you want to have a good productive time at a conference you need balance. Know what you want to achieve and who you want to connect with but also have fun and relax. The real you is more authentic when you are having fun.

::Wordless Wednesday:: Kinda... #LATISM15

::Momma Disclosure:: This is a compensated post. All statements are my true and honest opinion. 

If you know me, then you know that I can't possibly be wordless. Especially on a Wednesday. Ha. 

Last week I went on an amazing adventure, brought upon by an opportunity. LATISM is a conference that has gradually grown into a very well known and recognized organization. The organizers really do work hard to create a welcoming atmosphere and positive space for sharing. I am happy to have joined them this year and honored to have been selected as a Top Latino Digital Influencers. 

The experience is unique and if you have not attended you can research them here. I have been waiting to attend again since 2012, this year the opportunity was just right. It's one of the conferences on my Blog Conference Bucket List. 

Here is a sneak peek into that experience {full recaps later this week}: