::Timing and Being Serious::

I have been going through a bit of a "transition", maybe claiming a new sense of self and peace. Growing further in my own skin and owning who I really am. With moments like this always come a time of reflection. And, yesterday as I drove to lunch I had a couple of thoughts and one of them was how life is so short and really shouldn't be taken so serious. The second thought was about timing. How it has worked out for the better in my life and how I am now taking advantage of it. 

When I was in college my Biology professor who was probably about my age now, in her 30's, said this to me after I complained about an A-minus when I wanted an A or higher in her class. She said;

"It is not that serious. You think this class is the rest of your life, girl, you have a long way to go. And, this class is nothing compared to the real world. So, get over it." 

Boy was she right. At almost 35, I look around and think about people and all I can say is, "It is NOT that serious." I have had those words in my life for years since I was a 20-year-old in that Biology class. Trust me, my perspective on that day in that class to now 15 years later has truly changed. I have been through so much in my life, that now I can't help but think how short life is, and how it's really not that serious. Taking yourself too seriously and thinking that one experience or moment will define you, is not good for you.

I am not saying that I became this irresponsible person, who just threw caution to the wind and never strived for an A-plus or higher again. But, I did tone my seriousness down, cause I realized that life was about so much more than that A-minus in that one class! Y'all life is too short, there is so much to be lived, to be hung up on one thought, one idea, or one grade. I learned it all the hard way, as most of us do. These days I am serious when needed, just not all the time. 

Then I think about how timing is everything.

Yesterday I drove past two business that I had previously interviewed at, on the same street where I work now.  In the last two years, I had been looking for work but wanted to remain near my house for the sake of time and my kids. I used to work across the street from my house, but the position there wasn't what I had in mind for my career path. I knew I had to find a better job, even if meant driving further than across the street. Why remain in a toxic environment or a place you know doesn't fit who you are, when so much more it out there.

Well in those years I interviewed for two very good companies about 20 minutes from my house. The jobs both had good pay, but extended hours which was doable to some extent and were good positions. But, I wasn't selected for those jobs. Then I received a promotion at work and thought I would be fine to stay across the street from house, for a while longer. I wasn't really searching anymore. But, one day out of the blue in June of last year, a friend emailed me and asked if I was still looking for work. I said no but wouldn't mind hearing more about the opportunity she had.

Today I work exactly 15 minutes from my house, hours are great, pay is perfect and I am off every other Friday. I am still close to home and the job demand is better than what the other two jobs were asking for. Point is, that no matter how great the other two jobs were or how close I thought they were. The timing wasn't right. Now I drive past those two companies when I go to lunch and have no regrets about my new job.

Sometimes we want things to happen on our time and when we want them, but the stars and moon have to align for that perfect moment when all things good come. And, we just have to wait for those things to happen. Of course always working towards our goals but giving it time to reach us. And, time for us to learn and embrace our current situations.

Life is like that...a series of unexpected events that we sometimes need to embrace...

Happy Tuesday Everyone. 

How to Walk Away Gracefully... #StartingOver

I honestly don't believe the decision to walk away or leave is simple or made over night. I feel that it's made over time and after a lot of thought. Regardless of what the situation is. Leaving, removing yourself from a certain place, person, situation, area. To me it happens over time. It's something that is planned. You plan in the back of your head. You take all the actions needed to move forward. You take the steps that will allow you to leave with the most respect, most humbleness.  Depending on the situation you want to leave without hurting the other party involved and without feeling guilty or bad about your decision. 

Of course some situations are extreme and you do leave and don't care what is being left behind or who is being hurt. And, you might not care about the ties being broken. Those are different situations. 

For me, it wasn't something that I thought of yesterday or 3 weeks ago or months ago. Unfortunately it happened day one, over 2 years ago now. It was my job. My "career". But, from day one I didn't feel that it was for me. In the back of my head, I have my friends words with me when I told her where I was working and what my duties were. She said to me "Connie, really?! It's like putting the sun in the closet!!" 

She was so right. It was. 

I gave up after a while. Most days, I felt horrible. Because it was my job. I wanted to do my best and did most days. But some days, I just didn't care anymore. 

I looked for a long time and then I let it go. In the beginning of this year I decided to focus on my job and do well. Forgetting about the idea of leaving and even received a promotion. Months passed and I still didn't feel right. From one day to the next at the end of June, I had an interview. Suddenly, it all fell into place.

For the first time after a job interview my Husband said, "do it." If you know my Husband you know that he analyzes everything, within minutes you will know what he thinks and how it will all play out. So, for him to agree with what the new job was offering was a "sign" if you will. 

To me because things happened so quickly and just happen to all work out, it meant something.  I start my new job next week...

Whether or not its a new perfect situation. I don't know. But, I do know it's a new perfect situation to start over. To be myself again. To be renewed in who I am and how far I have come. At 34 being given an opportunity to continuously excel. To find myself again, because along the way, I lost who I was. That creative, happy being that LOVES working and meeting new people. Hence my blog thriving. I constantly seeked to be validated and renewed through my blog and all the events I attended. Filling that emptiness that had been created. 

An opportunity to do my best again. 

I had created a stand still. Filled with excuses and allowing others to lead when I knew I could so much more. But, the frustration set in and I had given up. That was me. How was it possible that everything else had fallen into place but my career had taken a stand still. I applied to so many jobs and received a constant NO.

Today, I am filled with hope and inspiration by the simple and almost silent, yes. 

A strong, resilient YES! Don't give up, ever. Keep pushing forward and working towards your goals and dreams. Follow your heart. Listen to your gut. 

Do you need help keeping motivated and being Inspired? HERE ARE SOME POSTS THAT HELP ME CREATE MY VISION:

http://mommaofdos.blogspot.com/2014/11/time-changeseasons-motivationalmonday.html

http://mommaofdos.blogspot.com/2015/04/a-2015-vision.html

http://mommaofdos.blogspot.com/2015/04/mujeres-legendariashouston-event.html

http://mommaofdos.blogspot.com/2015/05/women-empowerment-series-houstonlatinas.html

http://mommaofdos.blogspot.com/2015/04/vestido-rojo-latinasgored.html

{Material Girl in an Industrial World}

I am a Momma of many words. My brain over loads and at times I don't know if, how, when, or what to express but I do; in hopes that someone will be moved, motivated, or inspired to share their stories.

 

I am no SuperMomma nor do I pretend to be. I fail. A lot. In many, many, did I say many, areas of my life. I do. I cuss, I throw fits and I have melt-downs. Small ones. Big ones. Overly dramatic ones. But still, I move on.

 

It's been 11 days since my last post. So much has happened in those 11 days this Momma received a job offer, and I then proceeded to about 7 days of approving, document signing, drug screening, background screening, I think even credit screening. As well as re-enrolling my children into daycare. {A whole other post all it's own.} Then days of mental, physical and emotional preparation happened. Trust me the last 11 days have been busy for us.

 

Our home and hearts have been buzzing. Now notice, I haven't mentioned the words "dream job" I think in one of my last posts I mentioned, obtaining the right job for the right now. What is going on right now, is only what is right for now. I have a lot of faith in my decisions and my Hubby and I have discussed them thoroughly and it's what is best for us. There is plenty of time for dreams to come true.... plenty of room for growth.

 

For now my motivation are my Hubby's words. He says to me days after I accepted my new job offer... "all of the sudden the possibilities seem endless...." {as he stares at a 60 plus inch flat screen, blah-blah-blah at Target} and they do. He is my biggest support, my biggest cheer leader. We have faith in one another.

 

{About the job}

 

I don't usually speak too much about work. Work is work and because the world wide web is a public place I trend to keep certain information private. I will say this. I am in a whole new industry. I have become a material girl in an industrial world. Literally. It will be a new experience and one that I have been prepping for, for some time now. I am really enjoying the change of scenery. It's close to a lot of things and I love it.

 

I do feel super girly being in this mostly male dominated environment but it looks like it will be fun. I am excited. Did I say that already. Ha.

 

I hope all the Momma's had a great day last weekend and I will be back soon with not so many words and some pictures! You can also follow me on Instagram for a picture overload @mommaofdos or head on over to our facebook page ::HERE::

Developing Self-Worth {Career}

The other day I wrote about my faith and how much I have grown and learned over the years. Today, I want to tackle the Career aspect of Developing Self-Worth.

I have had a pretty good range of experiences in my life. From cleaning houses in the Summer when I was in High School with my Momma and my Tia to working in a Downtown office for corporate America. I had never really been without work. Or never really had to "find" a job. Most my positions were obtained because I knew someone. 

The last 6 months have definitely been an experience, not just the Staying@ Home part but the job seeking and seeking my "dream" job. When I was younger my ambitions were limitless. I wanted it all. The perfect job with the best salary and the best boss, with all the amenities and yes, my own corner office in a high rise building. Truth is, who doesn't! Then I started looking for this job and though I am sure that it is out there...I realized what I am really after is environment, flexibility and appreciation. For a company to capture my heart. To feel an excitement that I have not felt in years. 

Truth is. My dream job is one that I can learn and grow in. No matter how long it takes me. If the "amenities" come with it, then so be it. I just realized that companies these days can really make you doubt your self-worth and over all {monetary} worth. I know it shouldn't be all about the money but as a growing family we definitely have to calculate all of the necessities. And, ultimately as individuals we know how much we are worth. We also know the amount of work that it has taken us to be where we are. 

I think that overall if a job is good to you and takes your family into consideration and values your time spent with them then that to me can ultimately become your "dream" job, in the making. It doesn't have to be in a "perfect" place, with "perfect" people and "perfect" circumstances...it can be just about anywhere and I doubt it has to be fancy or of "high prestige". We are who we are because of what we make out of our own unique situation.

When I received my college diploma I thought I was on top of the world, the truth is that in order to make it anywhere you have to work hard and long to get out of it what you put into it. As cliche as that may sound, it's true. 

No matter what we do in life, it's going to take work and true dedication. I know now that what I have been  seeking most my adult life hasn't been a "dream" job but instead, "the" job... and everything else will only be shown through time and continuous dedication. 

In the mean time..I continue to seek and wait. And, wait and seek. It will come. One day....

On finding my Dream Career......

What I learned about myself and about being a Stay-@-HomeMomma....yes, I know it's only been about 3 months but trust me, I have learned my lessons well..

Right now. It's not the best thing for us..."you see the way my bank account is set up"...totally had to throw that in there...

First of all, the cleaning and laundry is NEVER ever, ever, ever done. Simple as that. It isn't. That's all. I mean before I had the excuse of; I worked 8{plus} hours today you expect this house to be spotless... now, I have uhm some excuses but really none. So, my theory is we should as Stay-@-HomeMomma's have like a Cleaning Fairy or something, one who comes in at night, cleans it all up and allows you to sleep 8{plus} hours and be all cute and dressed up during the day. No? Not happening? Yeah, I didn't think so. All, I have got to say is... if your home is spotless and you have 2 toddlers at home either you come to my house and help me out or you must not live with people who sleep standing up, don't produce waste, or who don't eat, wear clothes or play with toys. Just sayin'! {not a rant, just a Momma observation}

Secondly. YES,  My kids need me and my care and love. But, they have that regardless of me staying at home and as much as I count, say the ABCs and read to them....they need professional structure, instruction and learning tools.{I think.} Because, let's get this right, being a teacher; at home or in a school, is a gift. A talent that one is given with patience and a true passion for well, teaching. I for one, was NOT granted that kind of awesome gift, I barely made it through High School and College. Don't get me wrong, I am not dumb, I just don't feel qualified to be my children's teacher. Maybe later in life but for now, I would rather leave it up to the professionals. Who at my Son's daycare are AWESOME. I trust them and have faith that their daily instruction has done a lot for Santiago's daily structure and routine. Yes, it's a cost but it's worth it. Not to mention his speech and language have improved tremendously.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love. I adore. I live for my children. But, part of achieving my 2013 goals, personal and on many other levels is discovering what my true talents and gifts are. I love being at home and I think I do a good job but there are areas where I know that I would be of better help if I assisted rather than led. Simply said, being a Stay@HomeMomma is a gift that I have not fully developed yet. I know MANY awesome Stay@HomeMomma's but now I can honestly say..it's not totally for me.

The Dream Career..it's what I am after and seeking. It's what I am learning about myself and gaining confidence for each day. I believe that God has brought me here to this place not only to help me discover who I am but also where He thinks I would be of greater use for His purpose in my life. I am after it everyday from now on.

Now you may recall that I left my Full-time employment due to a full blown panic attack..well don't get me wrong, I am not easily taken, and I have done a lot as far as work goes, I just needed a break. I worked for over 4 years many jobs and through pregnancies and illness to help my Hubby get through school. It was my turn to relax for a bit and I have. And, now I will seek a job that will BETTER fit not only the financial needs of my family but one that has a better work to life balance and more suiting schedule for us. I know it's out there and it may take some time, but I know that God will lead me there in His timing. I trust and have faith in His love and His timing for my family.
 

{Viernes} ♥ & Work Travel....

It's been a busy week; work, home, life! Feeling blah and then the crazy weather....es no bueno in Houston.

It makes for a draby long drawn out week...I wished I was in bed most days but not possible for this Momma. It has been an "AHHH!" kind of week! And, this weekend.... CHANGE. Lots.

My Hubby is such an amazing person and I don't give him as much credit as I should...for weeks now he's been saying....I will be gone and you will miss me. To which I say...WHY? Why would I miss you? I got this! {It's the SuperMomma in me talking... }

Truth is. The day is here too soon.

This weekend Ricardo will leave for Utah. For 3 weeks! I will be a "single" Momma! All the single Momma's out there you will hear me whine and you will have to tell me to get over IT! And, I will. It will be a challenge with two kids that go to two separate places of care and who don't like waking up early and who cry, fight and make "meshes" everywhere.

I will fortunately have some help but as I told my boss at work... I don't want to abuse that help and I will not be fully dependant on others to help me all the time, I need to do most, if not all on my own. The next few weeks will test my organization, time management and sanity. {God help me.}

UTAH.

I am not sure how far that is from here but I am sure it's FAR. It's going to be crazy! We are going to try and get web cams so that we can see each other and mostly so the Hubby can see the kids! They will definitely think it's bizarre to have their Daddy there but  not there!

For those of you who don't know....My Hubby graduated from UH in May...in June he landed a pretty sweet job and in July on his first week at work... he was asked to go to Utah, as part of his training...for 3 weeks in August-September. Now, we are there.... Sunday he will catch his plane and be on his way...a new little adventure.... for Him and for our family! I am not sure we will get to visit him...so it will be tough! We shall see. Where this new little stage in our lives will take us....

"AHHHHH!"

I don't know what I will do or how..but I will. Manage.

I know it's a Blessing. I know God wanted this for us. And, I know my Hubby will only emerge a new person. A new well trained employee I am sure. And, somehow I feel that as individuals him and I will learn a lot about ourselves... that will help us grow as adults, spouses, parents, and everything else that make us.... US. Ha. I think that, that's what this whole journey has taught us so far... that we must be strong as individuals to be strong as a couple and a family.

Feliz Viernes a todos....

{On Working Late}

At one point in my life I thought I wanted a career...you know that kind of life where you have 20 different people calling your name all at once {not to be confused with your kids calling your name 20 times in a span of 20 seconds}, deadlines to meet, meetings to attend and  drink coffee for no reason at any given time of the day {this may have just happened regardless}....

Yeah. Uhm. At 31 with 2 toddlers{ the almost 3 year old and the 1 & 1/2'er}. That's totally not me anymore. At all. Or so I have come to realize it. Not by choice at least. In reality. That is my life outside of my home, I have happened to fall into this this called a career. And, it's been a bit well overwhelming to say the least.

You know as a young 20-something year old planning a future, buying a home and getting married while going to school and obtaining a degree to be a full-time career woman out in corporate America, I thought I was doing everything right. Now that I am 31, married, working, with 2 kids, and just so much going on around me, I doubt myself and where I am going or what I am really meant to do.

I want the at home life. With my Momma Loves running around in their diapers or not {totally by choice they both now know how to take off their clothes and their diapers, yes I know my life is awesome}, yelling and crying all at once, pushing and punching while pulling hair and asking each other for hugs, don't ask, they are totally filled with a  million emotions at every minute of the day, my house is  melt-down city or lovey-dovey town at any given moment of the day all the while asking to watch "Wal-Ace" for the millionth time on demand or else! {My son is totally into Wallace and Gromit, don't ask, I have no clue. He is a pretty random kid.}

That's the life I thrive for. {Silly me.}

I know it's not possible RIGHT now but maybe one day....in the near future. And, I know I ask for this a lot, the whole being at home with my kids and the maybe one day in the near future thing. It's just that the life I have I know is a Blessing and amazing but I just struggle with what God may be telling me to do. Drop it all and be a Super Momma or keep this life and prove to myself that I can do it.... that I CAN be everything I have ever wanted to be and more..but then I think; I am everything I have wanted to be and with my kids...so much more that I never thought I could be. Does that make sense?

It's a whole different world to have known the work-life and then motherhood.... I struggle. I want them both but where am I needed most?

I wanted to change the world and make the Hispanic community and better place...I wanted to heal the wounded and be recognized by the President one day for being so good at it. These days, I want to make my son be nice to his Nena {Sister} and my home and happy place filled with joy and happiness, faith and love, I want to heal every "boo-boo"  right as it happens and never be recognized for cause it's my duty as the Momma of my home. All I ask in return is for a warm hug that lights up my day, a nap with my lil'Momma and kisses from my lil'Man... it's the most amazing life that I want..but I guess we can't have it all...

The title really doesn't fit my post but it's when the feeling emerged as the clock hit 11pm and my Hubby texted me to say he was leaving  my daughter at my Mother-in-laws so that I wouldn't have to wake her up at 5 am the next morning just to take her back. The emotions hit me as I got home and my son was asleep and couldn't tell me how awesome of a day he had at school and how he had gone to the potty all by himself. The emotions arose as my Hubby said good-night and good-morning all at once, knowing that I wouldn't see him again for another 10 to 12 hours... all while working late and seeking purpose as to where this may lead me... and where God wants me to go....

I am a follower of Jesus but some days...I become confused and think about which path He really wants to lead me down...

While working late....

By the WAY, it's currently melt-down city in my house..... 

looking veryyy tired after a very long week.

{Frequently Asked Questions and Blog Advice!}

From me!!!?? OH MY!

I don't have this section on my home page yet, because I still considered myself a Baby-Blogger, Ha. But, I am so very humbled that new Momma Bloggers and my readers would even be interested in my Blog advice {and life!}!

Thank You so much!

Please know that I more than happy to read and respond to your emails and questions any time: mommaofdos@gmail.com


Here we go:

{These questions have all been sent in by readers and/or friends who want to start Blogging..I am in no way an expert nor do I consider myself a Professional Blogger but I don't mind sharing like with everything else in my life...how, what, where or when?}

The first question that I have been getting a lot, A LOT lately is this....

1. Momma, how in the world do you find time to Blog, Pin, FB, upload so many pictures, Twitter and email with Dos babies and a Hubby calling your name every minute?

Honestly, I have no idea. Ha. I make time. I am up late. A lot. No bueno, I know. I also have a Hubby who understands that I love to share and Blog and take pictures; most night he stands behind me at the computer saying.... "are you ready to go to bed yet?" Some nights I say, Nope. Others I run to my pillow. I also have a good set of kids who have at this point gotten used to Momma sitting at the computer a LOT. What I like to do is DART home, clean up, feed the kids and then while I wait for the Hubby, I compute and surf! Especially on nights when he goes to school..it's easier..less explaining and more time to think... Most night my kids will sleep through my writing. If I am realllyyyy hooked on something, I don't sleep and then do it all again in the morning. My house is a mess some nights and I still sit and think and type... On really good days when the Hubby says I am picking up dinner and  my Aunt who sometimes helps me clean happenes to drop by, I get LOTS and LOTS of free time. But, I figured that if I ever want to do this FT, I would want to wait until I can afford a Nanny and a Personal Assistant...Heyyy Dooce has is...why can't I!?

Second pregunta: Momma, how did you get started in Bloggy-Land?

Well, it just happened. Back in 2008 {Presidential, I work in Elections so I think in terms of types of Elections..any who} I started at my current place of business. I needed to practice my writing and also kills some down time. So, I started writing. I had NO idea what Blogging was all about but once I figured it out...I couldn't stop. I was addicted. Then, I got pregnant and had my son and had SO much more to share..and well then I got pregnant again and yeah... the rest is historia...

Next question please {Ha.}: Momma, I don't understand how Blogger works and what's the difference between this and Wordpress?

Honestly, to figure out Blogger {which by the way...goes on a trip some days but I love you Blogger!} it just takes  some time and just really messing with all the settings and buttons... I have tutorials on how to do certain things but then Blogger updates and changes so often, I am not sure if they are right or not..about the difference between Wordpress and Blogger for me it was a matter of design, Wordpress was simple and business like and Blogger just seemed more user friendly and fun! It's a matter of taste, I know a lot of Blogger's who use Wordpress and love it. I personally prefer Blogger. {Except when it's being whack! Ha.}

Fourth question: Momma, what kind of camera do you use? I don't have a super fancy anything I use my little Nikon P-80, it has grown on me but this Momma needs an upgrade! Maybe 2012 is the year for upgrades! Ha. I hope.

Question # 5: Momma, what program do you use to edit your pictures? I downloaded this program called Photoscape from Google and loved it. I am not a Photoshop expert but I do have it on my computer..horrible I know.... I will learn...one day soon!

Question # 6: Momma, what are your kid's names and how did you come up with them? Well, my son is Santiago Isaias; My Hubby and I just fell in love with the name Santiago, my Hubby is a huge Salsa fan..and he thinks the name Santiago Gomez makes for a very popular Salsa singer... {now we have to wait a few years and see if Santiago is even interested in Salsa or singing!} But, we gave him the name just in case... both his names are in the Bible and that was awesome too! My daughter...the amazing Camila Isabel, was derived also from Music! Go figure....Camila is our favorite Mexican Pop group! So, ever since we discovered their music, we have loved the name...as for Isabel. My Hubby is a HUGE movie buff! Yes, movies..music... he loves it all. His favorite movie is Legends of the Fall, if you've seen the movie then you know... if you haven't, the beautiful Native American girl in this movie is Isabel Two...the rest well is historia...

Number 7: Momma, is your Hubby an artist or musician?? UHM no. He thinks he is..but he is a Construction Management nerd by day and an ultra I think I am super hip guy from the 70's Hubby and Daddy by night! Ha! {Ok, I made this question up! Ha. It's fun.}

Pregunta Ocho: Momma, what is your ethnic background? I am a very proud Mexican-American. My parents were both born and raised in Mexico and came to the U.S. when they got married they later had me and my siblings. For the most part, I identify more with my Mexican side than with my American side. I speak mucho Español, me encantan los frijoles negros con epazote and tortillas de harina. But, I can also have a good plate of Tex-Mex enchiladas and feel good. I am really a mix of Border Town {Mission/Reynosa} Norteña  and  deep south Mexican roots {Temixco, Morelos!}. I love Pozole and I would kill for some taquitos de orjea o de tripas con cebolla y cilantro, and of course I love spicy salsa! I can dance cumbias all night but once those Chinelos come on....I just can't sit down! {That's me, Mexi-Mexi!}

Question # 9: Momma, where does your daily inspiration come from? Everywhere and everyone. First and foremost; Jesus. My faith and my beliefs. I love His word and reading my Bible. Then of course my everyday life with my Hubby and children. They are so amazing and special, a true gift from God, I love them more than life! Then just in general, everyday occurrences with life, my job, my friends, people who I meet, people who I walk by, my daily observations. Inspiration is around us and in us. I can't get enough..Oh yes and Pintrest of course! Ha.

Finally numero 10! Momma, why are you so awesome? Ha. Joke. Not a real question... Momma, who designed your Blog Page? I used to do all my own designs and even messed with making my own headers and what not...but more recently I have not had time and I asked an awesome fellow Houston Momma Blogger to help me out and she so awesomely transformed by page a while back... I think I will have to contact her soon to create something for 2012 for me! Her name is Jamie K. and here is her Blog link: http://www.designsbyjamiek.blogspot.com/

My Best Blog advice is just do it! Jump into it and even if you are not a super writer {which I am not} you will at least have a journal to go back to one day for yourself, for your kids and for your family! Even if you start and then fall off the bandwagon...keep pushing forward and when you can, get back to it. Life is crazy and hectic not everyone has time to write but trust me it's worth it if you can find the time. I have chronicled my life the last almost 4 years and I can't wait to print it out and look back..on my growth, on my faith, on my life...

Be the best you...for you and trust me everything else will fall into place!

If you have any other questions don't hesitate in emailing me.... even if I take long to reply...I do read and I will reply...promise! mommaofdos@gmail.com

Working Momma 101

Many of us work; inside the home, outside the home, BOTH.

As an outside the home working Momma, I have encountered many stories shared by women in the same place, many accomplishments, many moments of encouragement and Faith, but also challenges and times of true discouragement.

I think it's the enemy trying to deviate my focus.

I am usually a happy go lucky type of person, with many goals in mind but always with my family as a priority; my Husband and my children a like.

I know that where I am now, like many others is only temporary.

I like working and I love my job, my only problem these days is time.

My children are little so I like to think that it's not an issue and that it doesn't affect them as much as if they were older and aware that Momma left when it was dark and came home when it was bed time. It affects me. That's for sure. My Hubby being a Full-time student, I think is used to it. He calls me after class to see if the kids are asleep and rushes home. I on the other hand am not used to it. It's difficult. Small sacrifices now big rewards later?

I don't want to loose focus. I love my job. I love providing for my family. How do I deal though with these moments of Momma blues that just seem to drag me down.... Ahiii.

I pray that in the future my organization and some clarity of mind can help me deal... it's just so difficult tonight...for me to comprehend or grasp the idea that my kids can grow up without a Momma.... it wasn't what I signed up for when I decided to have children but it's how it's worked out.

I sit in the dark. Pray and hope that one day my nights become days and days last forever....

A late night thinkin' Momma.

{30 Emotions}

30 Things that I am today.....

1. Blessed.
2. Drained.
3. Tired.
4. Sleepy.
5. Full. 
6. Faithful.
7. Hopeful.
8. Exhausted.
9. Sad.
10. Concerned.
11. Inquisitive.
12. Annoyed.
13. Bumped.
14. Confused.
15. Amazed.
16. Thankful.
17. Friendly.
18. Loved.
19. Loving.
20. Caring.
21. Thoughtful.
22. Creative.
23. Inspired.
24. Motivated.
25. United.
26. Supported.
27. Supportive.
28. Seeking.
29. Lovable.
30. In Need.

In all I think the good outweighs the bad and THANK GOD it's Friday!

I don't think I could have handled another day in this work week!

Going Back.

I was devastated to go back to work when I had my son. I felt cheated and was so unhappy! 

This time. I have a little more peace. Being a Stay at Home Mom would be amazing, but it's not where we are right now. 

Where we are right now is a working class family. My husband is still in school but I pray that he will finish soon, in God's time I know. I will be returning to work not bitter but happy that I am a provider for my family and support for my Husband. 

We all have to make some sacrifices in our lives, some huge, others small, this one is a HUGE one for me. Not being with my children when they are little and handing them over to be taken care of. It always makes me nervous, they are my little bitty babies! I love them. I want to hold them all day and all night. My Santi is almost 19 months! 19 months! He is just a baby but all grown up and well my Cami...she is only 3 weeks old... I could cry but God has instilled new peace in me. 

I see my Husband and all the progress that he has made and how I have contributed to that progress. I love it. I love where our family is right now. We are not perfect. We don't have a HUGE house and make millions. Ambition in that sense is gone. We have goals and dreams that God has placed in our hearts and THAT is where we are going....THAT is where we are focused. Others may think that a big house, lots of money, vacations and fancy cars are happiness but I like where we are right now. Happiness is here and we are embracing it..good and bad.

I Thank God once more that 12 years ago he gave me the friend, the man, the partner that HE knew I needed not the one that I thought I wanted. My husband is who he is...I wouldn't change him for the world. Just like I am who I am. Our own selfish expectations about each other have been long gone and the purpose that God has given us as a couple, unchanged and unique as we are, has been an amazing ride!!!! 

The change, the expectations, began with each of us as individuals. We can only change ourselves, once others see the positive and good in us as an individual then they can decide if they want to follow. That is how my Husband and I have arrived at this place of Happiness, not settling, but satisfied! Just because we are happy doesn't mean we don't want MORE for our family, or that we are not working towards more, because we are, we do...everyday.... God has given us FAITH and instilled HUGE dreams and goals in our lives and THAT is where we are right now...fulling our dreams..following His purpose....HAPPY!!!! 


So, I will return to work in about 3 weeks or so....happy, with new goals and dreams....satisfied....and listening to God!!!

All in a days work:

So, I read GOOP. And, my recent newsletter came with a "day in the life of" 2 working moms. Just gave me the idea to Blog about my day...and see; where does the time go ?

Wakey-Wake~ "Usually" happens and SHOULD happen between 5:45am and 6:15am; anything after that cause serious chaos for both Ricardo and I. We both wake up bew-ry bew-ry quietly, because we don't want to wake the silly wabbit! I shower, Ricardo showers; or vice versa. We ask...my turn or yours, Ha. Usually I get in first. It's better this way. 

While in the shower I think and pray and often ask for strength and energy for that day...for the most part it all comes at once!

I then proceed to get dressed and "do my hair" and brush my teeth, almost in that order.

Ricardo does the same...but a lot slower....Ha.

I then go on to get Santi's clothes together and anything he may need at his Grandmothers that day.

Then depending on how much energy I, we,  had the night before I get our lunches together. Unless Ricardo did it the night before which is always a HUGE plus! 

After I get bags and lunches packed. I go on to dress Santi. These last couple of weeks have been cold so Ricardo will run out and turn our cars on...or I will. 

After much complaining, from Santi, I finally get him dressed and he either gets in my car or Ricardo's, depending on who's turn it is. These days he is bundled up and carried out..usually he walks to the car as we marvel and giggle at him looking like a Little Man! 

He then gets dropped off and we rush to our jobs. In Houston traffic from our house, rushing means at least 45 mins in traffic..if we are lucky 35 mins, if it's bad about an hour or more. 

Me I have to go and drop my car off at my Mom's outside of Downtown and then she brings me to work; it's cheaper this way. 

Workie-Work~ Really it's a blur. Some 8 hours are great and others..not so much. Most of you know what I mean. 

I get out of work at 4:30pm. Ricardo right gets out at 5:00pm; except when he is in school...because then his schedule is crazy. 

Going Home~ I have to be picked up, if I was early enough to get dropped off. If not I can usually park for about $6.00 a day a couple of blocks from my building. If I park I get out of Downtown fast and beat SOME traffic. If I don't I have to wait for my Mom and usually get to my car around 4:45 or 5:00pm. I get lazy when I get to my Mom's..so some days I linger..others I run! 

I then set out to either go straight home or to pick up my Little Man. Right now since Ricardo hadn't started school just yet, I loved hearing..."GO HOME. I will get La'lly" (It's what Ricardo calls the baby...like Daddy) ! That is music to a 28 week pregnant woman who dreams of laying in a soft warm bed with about 15 minutes of silence after a long day at work! 

If I go straight home I can usually make it there by 5:30 at the latest maybe 5:45. If I pick baby up it will surly be 6 pm or later...depending on much I linger at my Mother-in-Laws house. When Ricardo is at school I like to run home so I don't get home when it's dark. When he is not, I know he will be there so I linger more. Or if we know what we want for dinner and are gonna start cooking right when we get home, I rush. 

I finally make it home and depending on if Ricardo is in school or not the routine varies. These days I am 28 weeks pregnant and Ricardo was on Winter break from school. So, the "uhm I will do it tomorrow" sets in. When he is not around and at school. I run home. Clean up. Make food (defrost, microwave, prepare, cook, whatever the case maybe), again these days Ricardo was home and he will either say make this, I will make this, or lets just get some take out! Another sound of music in my ears....We "usually" all eat around 7 or 7:30pm no later than 8pm. If baby is awake he eats as well. If he is asleep we eat really fast before he wakes up so we can veg out for about 10 to 20 minutes. 

If Ricardo is in school and baby is asleep. I run around like a mad woman picking up around the house, cleaning, washing clothes and getting things straightened out for the next day! If Santi is awake, we play and when I get him distracted enough I run off and do chores until he finds me again..it's fun actually! Again, it was Winter break so Ricardo helped me with trash and dirty clothes and cooking and ohhhh yes DISHES...which I hate!!!! He also plays with Santi when I have the energy to just do all of the above mentioned.

All of this does or doesn't get done by 8:30-9:00pm after which Santi gets a bath and into his pj's and we pray that he falls asleep by 10pm so that we can also get in bed. He's not the best at a set bed time. It depends how much he slept during the day which is never a set time. If he slept a lot bed time is usually mid-night. If he didn't get much sleep then 10pm is pretty standard. We pray with him, talk to him while he falls asleep and then after he is done "telling us about his day" he is out until about 6:30-7am the next day when all this starts over again!  

In between all this I try to get other things in; like my "projects", my ME time, my Bible reading time or just reading time, husband/wife talk time, maybe some TV, and anything else that may need to get done...bills, mail sorting, etc etc.

We don't have a set schedule but I guess we have a pretty set routine!

Weekends are a bit better...only a bit...It depends on the weekend.

After I look it all over and think about it all, I wonder..how will I do with 2 children, how do I manage to stay afloat and when do I have time to potty and breath!?!

I guess we (busy working moms and wives) just do.

God, I know, gives me strength everyday!

Proverbs 31:³¹ Reward her for all she has done.
      Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.